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TIME TO CIRCLE THE WAGONS GIRLS
Comments
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Jan:
I hope someone does set him up.And expose him for the fraud he is.It would tickle me pick for someone to say "Oh by the way I know your wife and she is a wonderful person"or something like that.His day will come.0 -
wow i just got this email and found it really touching!!! I am not religous either....
>>Shoes in church , Lloyd.
I showered and shaved............. I adjusted my tie.
I got there and sat.............. In a pew just in time.
Bowing my head in prayer......... As I closed my eyes.
I saw the shoe of the man next to me..... Touching my own. I sighed.
With plenty of room on either side...... I thought, "Why must our soles touch?"
It bothered me, his shoe touching mine... But it didn't bother him much.
A prayer began: "Our Father"............. I thought, "Thisman with the shoes.. has no pride.
They're dusty, worn, and scratched. Even worse, there are holes on the side!"
"Thank You for blessings," the prayer went on.
The shoe man said............... a quiet "Amen."
I tried to focus on the prayer....... But my thoughts were on his shoes again.
Aren't we supposed to look our best.. When walking through that door?
"Well, this cer tainly isn't it," I thought, Glancing toward the floor.
Then the prayer was ended............ And the songs of praise began.
The shoe man was certainly loud...... Sounding proud as he sang.
His voice lifted the rafters......... His hands were raised high.
The Lord could surely hear.. The shoe man's voice from the sky.
It was time for the offering....... And what I threw in was steep.
I watched as the shoe man reached.... Into his pockets so deep.
I saw what was pulled out.......... What the shoe man put in.
Then I heard a soft "clink" . as when silver hits tin.
The sermon really bored me.......... To tears, and that's no lie.
It was the same for the shoe man... For tears fell from his eyes.
At the end of the service...... As is the custom here.
We must greet new visitors.. And show them all good cheer.
But I felt moved somehow............. And wanted to meet the shoe man.
So after the closing prayer........ I reached over and shook his hand.
He was old and his skin was dark..... And his hair was truly a mess.
But I thanked him for coming......... For being our guest.
He said, "My names' Charlie.......... I'm glad to meet you, my friend."
There were tears in his eyes....... But he had a large, wide grin.
"Let me explain," he said......... Wiping tears from his eyes.
"I've been coming here for months.... And you're the first to say 'Hi.'"
"I know that my appearance........."Is not like all the rest.
"But I really do try................"To always look my best."
"I always clean and polish my shoes.."Before my very long walk.
"But by the time I get here........."They're dirty and dusty, like chalk."
My heart filled with pain............ and I swallowed to hide my tears.
As he continued to apologize......... For daring to sit so near.
He said, "When I get here..........."I know I must look a sight.
"But I thought if I could touch you.."Then maybe our souls might unite."
I was silent for a moment............ Knowing whatever was said
Would pale in comparison... I spoke from my heart, not my head.
"Oh, you've touched me," I said......"And taught me, in part;
"That the best of any man............"Is what is found in his heart."
The rest, I thought,................ This shoe man will never know.
Like just how thankful I really am... That his dirty old shoe touched my soul
You are special to me and you have made a difference in my life.
I respect you, and truly cherish you.
tracey0 -
Nicki--
Wow---the day certainly didn't go as we all planned for you. My first bone scan led to additional x-rays of my shoulder and upper chest and scared me half to death. Guess what---rotator cuff injury. Well, duh----I told them it was frozen! My point being that they follow up on every festered hangnail and hinky shadow just to protect us. So have another glass of wine and know we are all sitting right next to you sipping right along. Please let us all know what they say tomorrow---we love you, sister.
Jeannie0 -
Jeannie - I am so glad you mentioned rotator cuff! I have a torn one and I bet it shows up on the bone scan I'm having. I'll just let them know ahead of time.
Nicki - special gentle hugs. Hope you get some answers you want and need tomorrow. I'll be thinking of you.
Vickie - oh poor Nathaniel. Hope he's doing better in the morning. what a scare for him.
Susan - oh goody! You and Cheri are coming to OK? LOL
Madison - may need your daughter's opinion on something. My vet thinks my dog may have Cushings disease which is NOT good! Can't wait for you to visit her.
Robin - sure wish I knew Evil's chat name and what sites he frequented. I could sure have some fun with him. GRRRRRR
Amy - new animals? You are going to have the coolest farm.
Tracey - I love that. I've read it before - it's so good.
Okay, I know I missed so many. You guys are wonderful!
See you tomorrow. I'm pooped!
Hugs
Liz0 -
Hi girls. I had this funny and insightful post written and lost it. I am sooo disgusted. I was almost finished and don't even know what I hit to lose it. I really did have one, unlike the 'alleged' one we heard about last night.
So I'm just going to try and remember what I'd written. Kind of a recap.
First, I love this place, too. I spend alot of time here. But I'm just not the mushy, gushy person like my pal Vickie is. She's a sweetie and that stuff just flows from her. Me, on the other hand, do things a little different. I'm into the, "you only tease people you like" stuff. so to all of you....what Vickie said. hahahaha
Shokk, thanks for suggesting the knock-out juice for the baby today but my dd took the day off and came home to take care of him and I was able to get a nap. Still have a trace of that old stomach diarrhrea. But the baby is better and that's what counts.
Shel, congrats on your 1 yr last chemo anniversary. My dates pass me by too, mainly cos I don't know what they are. BTW, it's good to see you posting on a more regular basis again.
Tracie, loved both your poems. Thank you for sharing.
Sheri, sounds like it might be good news about your sons biopsy.
Liz, I wish you arthritis and old age. Now that's a friend. lol
Amy, are you telling me I've been replaced by a donkey as the driver of the Magic Carpet? Cool. I've dealt with asses all my life. lol Speaking of asses, wouldn't it be fun to catch Robins dh in chat sometime. That was quite an idea you had. We could really set him up.
Robin, can you find out his user name and where he chats? Do a little detective work. I have alot of free time and Amy, Jan and some of the others would love to catch him. We wouldn't just jack with him we'd tell the whole room what kind of guy he is. OOh, what real fun!! see what you can do.
Colleen, the baby is better he's got some asthma. He's not even coughing anymore. At least not right now. thanks for asking.
Nicki, don't jump to conclusions. I know you are scared and worried. We are all here for you. If you want to talk pm me, or if there's anything I can do let me know. If you want to bitch, cry, rant or whatever, I'm a good listener. And I'm discreet. I dont think this is going to be anything serious, but if it is, you will pull yourself together and deal with it. That's just the way you are. But don't ever feel alone. Everythings going to be alright, Nickster.
Joyce, so glad Kevin liked his afghan. Hope you and your family are doing well.
Gina, anxious to find out more about your port that you can't do anything with. Somethings not right. They can do better than that. Hope you're feeling better. They couldn't get mine in during surgery after trying twice so they had a radiologist to put it in. I was awake and he made 2 attempts before he got it. The experience was ugly. But I have sure been happy with it. I'm dreading the day they want to take it out.
Meaner, hope you're feeling better.
Hey to Iris, Denise, Madison, MB, Lisa, and everyone else.
May you all sleep well and wake to a light mood.
pals
cheri0 -
Oh Nicki! WHAT A SCARE!
Listen- techs do not know everything.
And bone scans only show just so much. You need a better diagnostic test before you go from 0 to Panic in ten seconds...
don't forget my extra thick forehead bone scan incident!
I know you are mad at this disease.
I AM TOO!
Watch this clip from my favorite movie-
Pretend you are Ralphie and the Beast is Farcus. It will help- really!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07geXDHjpYU&mode=related&search=
Love you sister!
g0 -
I didn't have a good day either.
My port is either infected, a blood clot or f-d up.
And my mom had some kind of heart attack this afternoon during a colonoscopy.
And they want me to start Adriamycin next week??? I don't THINK so.0 -
Cheri:I will see what I can find out that is a wonderful idea.He has hurt my feelings so bad in the past 2 years its time for him to hurt.
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Oh,NS I am sorry things are dark right now for you,but you have gut and determination and remember your name..This is my third port and today my onc found the tubing is exposed in the jugular vein so now I have to go to the sugeron and have more stitches put it.I am so sick of this crap i could scream.
I hope you feel better soon.0 -
OMG Gina! How is your Mother? If you have a blood clot, or an infection I do believe you should go to the ER! Is it so bad that it can't wait til tomorrow? You just simply call someone to take you to get help. Don't mess around with things. Everything you've had done through this whole surgery has gone wrong. Now this is just going too far. What were they thinking when they sent you home with a port like that anyway? Keep us posted.
pals
cheri0 -
Quote:
Hey Janis or other Chicago girls- if anyone is around Wrigleyville on Sat, pm your number and I'll give you my cell. I'll be at the game on Sat only. Go Cards!
Just wanna make sure any Cg's from Chicago see this. Have a great weekend all!0 -
Sending love and prayers to all before I throw some more logs on the fires and roll into bed
Nite all0 -
Wow-
I was gone most of the day...and it seems that things have taken a sharp turn to the left for some of you today...
NS, Gina, all my sisters....I am holding you up in prayer. I am holding you all close to my heart and sending you healing energy. '
So .. Dr. Deb prescribes
Tons of hugs, virtual and otherwise
A glass of your favorite concoction or
A valium if ya got one
Many repeated deep breaths
Prayers for peace
And rest any way you can get it better living through chemistry is ALWAYS a good thing.
I wish there was more I could do from here. I would like to gather you all into a warm living room and make you tea We would talk for hours, get some sleep and talk again over breakfast.
Wed sing along with Bob .
Dont worry about a thing,
cause every little thing gonna be all right.
Singin: dont worry about a thing,
cause every little thing gonna be all right!
I wish I could fix things
Extra hugs
Love
Deb C0 -
Its morning! I slept pretty good believe it or not. Guess thats cause I took 2 xanax and a darvocet! I don't have an overwhelming fear like I thought I would. But I'm still pretty angry.
Thank you all for your well wishes. Here's the thing. If this showed up anywhere else but my rib - no problem. I would guess it was arthritis cause of aging! But in my rib? What the heck could that be? You dont get arthritis in your rib. When the tech told me a broken rib or something, she had sadness in her eyes. Said take good care or yourself. Its not fun being a nurse and going through all this stuff - cause I know way too much. Makes it easier for my mind to go where I dont want it too.
It's strange how people respond. My husband came to bed after I fell asleep. Now mind you, I had 4 glasses of wine and passed out! And how lucky - no hangover this morning. I talked to my sister who didnt know what to say to me. Then I talked to my best friend who didnt know what to say either. I think everyone around me is just fed up with this whole disease.
To all my stage 4 friends. I am humbled. How strong you are! Your dealing with reality. And here I come along with all these crazy notions.
To top everything off, I am gonna have a really busy day. Training someone from corportate, so he will be riding around with me all day. In a way - thats good as it will keep my mind busy, but it will be hard trying to talk with my doctors. They must be able to get a preliminary reading! But then what do I do if they call me with the results and its not good news. Cant break down around a corporate trainee!
Susan: "I hate it for you and for all of us." That really sums things up. This whole experience really stinks! And I dont see an end to it!
Jan: Lots of people tell me I spend too much time here. But when I reached out to them yesterday, they didnt know what to say. I could tell they were relieved when I said I needed to get off the phone. They dont understand whats going on in my head. They never will understand. But I say, go out there and enjoy life. Enjoy everyday. Start living again!
Im sorta laughing as I read through your posts. Seems like alot of us hit the wine glasses last night. Glad I wasnt drinking alone.
Robin: You are giong through so much and Im sured your tired of it all. Makes my problems seem so small in comparison. So just sending you a hug.
Amy: Same thing goes for you. I have aches and pains all over. The one place I dont have any problems in my left rib cage. So its hard to imagine, that is where they saw something. You are fighting such a bigger battle than I. And yet, you are always so positive.
Lisa: So your test showed a fractured rib? Did you have pain? I have no pain at all. No trauma to the area. But I can feel myself going into denial already. Its a good place to be.
Joyce, Liz, Madison, Cheri and Vickie: Thank you all for your kind words.
Jeannie: I didnt freak out when they needed to take extra pictures. I was thinking to myself, OK - they are seeing some hot spots and want to look closer. They took extra pictures of my rt. femur which is where my pain is, but those were ok. What freaked my out was what the tech said to me.
NS: Gosh, Im so sorry about your mom. Im hoping it was a mild heart attack and that she will be ok.
OK! Enough is enough. You all dont need to hear and be around this negativity Im feeling. Thinking maybe I will put some exercise clothing on and go for a brisk walk. Oh and Im stopping on my way to work and getting the biggest donut I can find. Who cares about losing weight? Not me - anymore. Im gonna eat everything I like. Might even get some mashed potatoes with gravy!
Have a good day evryone.
Nicki0 -
Good Morning sweet sisters,
Oh my it's gonna be a warm day here finally. 60 degrees!
Tweaking your toes Nicki...keeping you in my prayers.
Gina...ok...enough already. Sending you another angel to protect you. Get it checked out ASAP. How is your mom? That's enough to make you a nervous wreck.
Tracey...I have never seen that poem and I loved it! Thank you.
Marsha...HI and sending you a big old hug.
Robin...Cheri has a great idea...all we need is his user name and boy could we have fun!
Cheri dear...yup sappy Vickie...and you can use my words any time you want! I know how much love is behind all that teasing, you can't fool me. So there!
Gotta run as Nate has a hankering for french toast...gotta shower and get dressed and squeeze in enough time to make it...yikes. He's been up a while peeking at the kittens and lookin to see if anyone is home next door.
TGIF girls!!!!
I'll catch up later
love ya's
Vickie0 -
Nickie-I am thinking of you today. I'll check in after work
TGIF!!!
Good Morning All and have a great day!
Joyce0 -
Joyce and Vickie: Good Morning to my early Sunshine sisters. I hope you both have a grand day.
Nicki0 -
Nicki first of all she is a tech........second of all I don't think you spend too much time here; it looks like to me you are living your life; you get all of us up here in the morning and then you are working your back side off all day doing a job that is rewarding and then you come back in check in and take the time to respond to us indiviually and give out words of encourgement and tell us good night......let's face it my family is sick of bc my girls are tired and maybe scared of hearing about my concerns and fears and I don't blame them so I come here....I know everyone here will know exactly how I am feeling and know exactly what to say......Nicki we all love you here......I heard Dr. Oz on a radio show here and some girl called in and is fighting her second round of lukemia (sp) and he told her if all cancer patients can just hang on for a little while longer researchers are on the verge of finding ways to control and eliment mets.........Nicki this fight is not over for any of us and we all know it.....you are one tough little Italian girl.......We love you...........
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Nicki, Joyce, Vickie and Shokk, Good Morning
Gina, I agree with Vickie, we are going to send another Angel to protect you. Please let us hear from you today. I so hope your Mom is okay.
Nicki, prayers that you are able to speak to your docs and get GREAT news.
Hugs to all (running late today)
I'm back just to say that this is the only place we can come where everyone understands our fears....I had two appointments yesterday-and did NOT tell my girls.
Madison0 -
Ok Gina is there any reason why you think you have heart disease? I'm not sure how old your mom is but having heart issues when you are in your seventies and eightes are not uncommon......when they were getting ready for me to do dd TAC they were doing all the scans and that is when they did the lung bio. because the scans showed leasions in my lungs and it turned out to be sarcoidois and I had had coughing problems for yrs.......it also causes heart paplations (sp) so I remember going in for a heart mri that took about 2 hrs to make sure I would be able to handle the chemo....I had no idea that it could cause heart issues...anyway Gina talk to the onc but surely he would not give this to you if they thought for a moment that you would have problems....if you do then you can stop and try something else....plus they are giving this to you one at a time...good luck....get the port fixed,...please check in today and let us know your thoughts.....and concerns.....
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CGS, Praying for all of you. Tracy what a beautiful poem, thank you. NS what can i say, my heart aches for you praying for your mother and you. Sweet Nicki, You too! God Bless, and madison what kind of test did you have?? Puppy
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Good morning Madison, Vicki, Joyce, and Puppy.....Madison will be thinking about you today..........Hey DebC good night....
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sending warm hugs and wishes to all of you feeling pain. this isn't easy for any of us and I can sure relate to being angry and saying ENOUGH. I don't know why all this happens but I can tell you we are all special and strong and wonderful. I'm snuggling up my dusty shoes next to yours so our souls can unite.
thanks for the poem tracey.
xo
susan0 -
shokk, the heart damage caused by adriamycin is usually not reversible. oncs are fully aware of the potential risks, and in most instances encourage their patients to assume that risk as the potential benefits far outweigh the potential risks. (and the actual 'stats' regarding the incidence of heart damage is marginally smaller than the risks of cancer recurring without treatment)
in my case (and many others)there was no deficit in heart function before the AC, nor a family history ......... but i encountered irreversible damage despite.
that being said ......... i'd assume the risk again if (god forbid) the need be! as we always say around here "it's a crap shoot" on many different levels!0 -
Good Morning Girls!
Prayers and thoughts to all having test and procedures and those waiting for results.
Nicki: You are mad, and I'm glad. I am so sick of this beast destroying so many. Not just by invading bodies with his evils, but the mind games he dares to leave all of us with.
You, my dear, will be fine. I'm not as medically pronounced as you, but I do know enough that I know I read responses, looks and silence from techs and docs as if I know exactly what they are thinking or seeing. Not only because I've "been there, done that" but because I work with and around medical personal and procedures all the time.
My Mom always tells me that I've always self dx. True, I've said I had a brain tumor for as long as I can remember!! (hopefully, words don't come true!!) Years ago, my family doctor told me to quit reading so much. Meaning..quit Diagnosing!
Yes, I've also been told that I spend to much time on the boards. People (family) think that the more time we spend on the BC topic, the harder it is to move on. HELLO!!!!!!!!!! If we didn't have each other, I know that I'd be more emotionally cracked than I already am. I've told them that this Web isn't all Doom and Gloom..We're friends with alot in common. We laugh, talk, encourage, cry, hold hands, and go on fantastic vacations. (okay, so maybe we are a bit cracked....of course no one understands our weekend get aways!!)
I have a wonderful family..but to them, BC ended on Oct. 22, 2003, when the beast was removed and put in a jar and sent to pathology. If it were only so easy!
Family..I mean, it's hard to explain..They think our Afghan project is wonderful, My sisters and nieces will be walking with me in the Komen Race..4th year!!
I guess what I'm saying is....what so many others have said.
When we reach out to anyone "who hasn't been there", they do not know what to say.
My Sister and I saw the same thing when we lost our Sons. We felt like some people avoided us......we would say that they thought we "contagious" X 2. If you haven't been in these places...it's easier to ignore than face.
Okay! I have no idea where or why all that came from..I will step away from the Podium now....regroup and be back in a few with my post.
Love and Hugs,
Denise0 -
Guess I left everyone hanging around to long.....they just ate my post and said whatever is no longer valid. Think that means I had the site open to long. Anyhow, I'll have to repost this evening. As I said in my "long begone" post...I am pushing the late button again today. Unfortunately, I believe this is my "new Normal!" Sitting here without hair curled, makeup on or dressed at 10:38a and I have to be at an inservice/training at 11:30a!
Love and Hugs,
Denise0 -
Morning ladies,
I am here a bit earlier this morning cause I had to check on dear Nicki and see how her hangover was. lol. Great to hear you dont have one but I was just forced to drink with you last night and I have a wee bit of a headache just so you know. Its not good to drink alone ya know cause people would talk. Headache will pass soon but at least I know whats causing it and I am not convincing myself that BC has gone to my brain.
Nicki-Cant wait to hear back from you today and I feel certain the italian in you will get some kind of answer. I keep thinking that I was convinced I had lung mets cause something showed up on my ribs when I had a bone scan but then when checked further it wasnt and I was freaking out for nothing as usual. You are a strong cookie and things will be ok. Hope you enjoyed the doughnut by the way.
Vickie-thats just awful about Nate and your neighbors. Poor little boy. Speaking of Nate does he read the Animorph books? If he likes things like that let me know cause my son has read all of them and we have quiet the collection. My sons a reader also.
Cheri-yep like you I am not the sentimental type either. If I was you all might worry about me. It takes all of us to make the world go round though and we are all beautiful dammit. Mazer says she will share her pilots seat with you but she did ask that you please keep your hands on the wheel so I gotta ask,,what were you doing to my poor innocent donkey??? I mean now Cheri thats just not right. I know your husband is on the road alot and all butttttttttttttttttt,,,,,Oh my!
Madison-so how was your doctors appointments yesterday? Inquiring minds wanna know. Sent you a PM with an address btw and also emailed it to Vicki.
Jan-Just dont stay away too long cause us worry warts will come find you. I know what you mean about nice weather though and being out. I sneak in at work so regardless of nice weather I am at work unfortunately. Have fun cruising around on the bike. I rode my dirt bike last night when I got home and SO and Tucker were on the 4 wheelers and we had fun. We should have been cleaning house but oh well. I did swiffer and vaccuum and phone some clothes this morning before I came to work so that was good.
Still got baby goat Precious Pea in a crate in the kitchen so if you dont stay on top of things the house smells like a barn,,lol. Then again, thats better than boy smells.
Margaret-boy smells doesnt come from eating in their rooms. Its just there regardless. Tucker did clean his room last night and his bathroom and it looked nice. I was shocked. I even looked under his bed and could see clear to the other side and the closet was normal. Maybe just maybe there is hope for him yet.
Denise-I think we all get told that we spend too much time on here because people dont understand how good it is for us. I know my SO has said do I think its a good thing when somebody gets mets and I have to hear about it. Doesnt that bring me down? I say yes but I want to support them like they support me. She really understands but just wants to make sure I am ok, I think. We learn more on here though to stay on top of things than anywhere.
NS-man oh man does nothing go the way it should with you? I swear you deserve a break. I hope your mom is ok and keep us informed. Big hugs sister.
Hey Shel-enjoying seeing lots of post from you lately. Any job news?
Robin-ok girl we gotta figure this out cause I could have so much fun messing with Evil. Heck we got many girls on here that would sign on at the same time to mess with him. Oh my gosh! I could just smack him for your comment of wanting somebody to bow down to him. Let him bow and I will give him a swift kick. Oh he is not worthy of even living. Bow down shish,,,oh I need his user name.
Tracey-not religious here either but enjoyed the story.
Joyce-glad Kevin liked his afghan. Its so nice to be wrapped in hugs from the circle girls.
Deb-yep stay gone for a day and you miss out on way too much. Hows the muddy mush going? Did hubby get the leak fixed? I'm telling you,,,, bring on the duct tape.
Susan-gotta watch that Cheri now I'm telling you. My poor lil innocent Mazer.
ok gotta run. In laws, I guess thats what you call them,,will be here today and probably be here 2 weeks or so or longer if we can convince them to stay longer. Who knows. Will be fun regardless.
Bye for now. Amy0 -
GM CG
THERAPY WENT WELL. I WALKED 150FT. AND HAD A GOOD DAY.
BUT IT SEEMS AS ALOT OF U DIDNT, SORRY IHOPE IT GETS BETTER.
THIS MORNING DID NOT START WELL. IT TOOK UNTIL NOW TO GET MY BODY TO MOVE.
TIME TO EAT LUNCH
jANKAY0 -
Shel you are the best.....thank you.....I had no idea even to this day...I think when I was dx everything was happening so fast even though I felt like I was moving in slow motion....how do you know if the adriamcyin caused the damage....did you have symptoms?....are you tested?
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Hey Amy have fun with the "outlaws" (the name we call inlaws in TX)this weekend.......its your weekend so I have a feeling we won't see you till Monday because you will be outside working.......Good morning Denise and Jankay, Jankay on the walking...you go girl....well this morning in NorthTexas it is extremely humid and I have worked on my hair and the best I can do is did any one ever see the mug shot of Nick Nolte when he got busted for DWI????Let's just say my hair looks exactly like he's did in that pic....geez.....Hey Tracey you better kiss 39 good bye and salute 40 girl.....yipee......I will look forward to wishing you a happy birthday when you turn 50!!!!!!Ok girls I had better get some work done.....TGIF....it has been the longest wk.......check back in later..........
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