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I WANT MY MOJO BACK!

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Comments

  • casinogirl
    casinogirl Member Posts: 476
    edited December 2005
    Claiire - Sounds like you had a very Merry Christmas! (except for that not getting morning sex part) Where do you get your toys? Do you order them online?



    You've probably already posted this info several times on this thread, but between the recent ooph and Arimidex, I am pretty much brain dead.



    Thank God for good mojo!



    Donna
  • jaybird627
    jaybird627 Member Posts: 1,227
    edited December 2005
    No new toys for me, but I did buy some Zestra. It's definitely different (and expensive!) and I'm not sure I like it yet but I think its claim of "enhancing" the experience is true. I've onlt tried it alone and found it to be irritating (but not in a bad way) and would be concerned how it would affect a partner. Would it stimulate him more, too? Not necessarily a good thing since some guys just don't know how to last but perhaps worth a try after warning him of the different sensation it causes? Also, being single again (my boytoy has run away once again - he does this every so often but always comes back) I'm looking for condom advice? I have no idea which is the best one but I saw one by Trojan (?) called For Her Pleasure or something like that and it has nubs. Do they work better than the smooth ones? I'm really not well versed in this area but if it can make my experience better why not try them? My sexual response isn't what it used to be but I do respond just more slowly and I'm looking for anything to help my post-menopause situation! Thanks!

    Janis L
  • Claiire
    Claiire Member Posts: 60
    edited December 2005
    The most recent toys were purchased at a local "adult store", but I have purchased condoms, lube and other toys online from Nite Time Toys.

    Maybe if I am lucky I'll get a bootie call tonight! If not, the toys are coming out!
  • Claiire
    Claiire Member Posts: 60
    edited December 2005


    I have tried several different condoms hoping to get some special feeling or sensation from them. All in all, one was the same as the other. I'm going to rate them for you 1 being no good - 5 being great.

    I tried:

    Inspiral Condoms 2
    One of the most innovative condoms around, Inspiral has won a tremendous following with its pleasure-enhancing design. The beautiful, nautilus-like curves of an Inspiral condom move in a patented "spring-action." This creates stimulating friction all around the glans penis for the excitement of both partners.


    LifeStyles® Flavors 3 (just for the novelty of color and flavor - otherwise just a normal condom)
    LifeStyles Assorted Flavors condoms offer three flavors and colors to tantalize the both of you! Includes: Very Strawberry, Sensuous Vanilla, and Tropical Banana.

    Trojan® Her Pleasure 4
    Show the woman in your life how much you care with these quality condoms from Trojan. The unique textured latex is specifically designed to enhance Her Pleasure,

    Durex® Avanti Polyurethane 5 (I liked this one because it didn't matter what we used for lube!!!)
    Durex Avanti Polyurethane condoms are the original non-latex choice, made from a technologically advanced polyurethane that is thinner than latex for enhanced sensitivity and comfort. Each condom is individually tested, pre-lubricated, and has a reservoir tip. Safe to use with water-based or oil-based lubes

    I purchased them all at: [url=http://www.nitetimetoys.com/]Nite Time Toys[/url).
  • 2up
    2up Member Posts: 944
    edited December 2005

    ok you guys, please excuse my ignorance on this matter but i've read this entire thread in prep for whats to come! i hate the thought of losing it and want to try and keep it up (no pun intended) as much as possible! i'm always 10 steps ahead of myself, lol! anyhow, can you guys please gimme an idea when ITS gonna start to go? i've only had one ac so far, so i'm still good to go, but i like to be prepared, so i can prepare my guy too and do what i can to still find some enjoyment, thanks....shel

  • jaybird627
    jaybird627 Member Posts: 1,227
    edited December 2005
    Oh, Shel. I don't remember when my sex drive went but probably shortly after my 1st A/c. I had a sometimes-lover and I know I still had hair and I know we didn't have sex again after I shaved my head so it was sometime between the 1st and 2nd chemos. My sex drive tanked but yours might not. I wasn't in a relationship and that guy didn't turn me on all that much so maybe I could have been better with someone better? As the months ensued I'd gotten friendly again (no sex right away though) with an ex and my libido pretty much started right up again. Slowly but I wanted him despite being bald and not feling 100%. So no matter what go easy on yourself as we're all different. Hopefully you'll fare better than I! Now, I'm working on my next young lover. Since menopause I've started liking them a lot younger than ever before. Is this my mid-life crisis???

    Janis L
  • 2up
    2up Member Posts: 944
    edited December 2005

    oh thank you janis!my husband and i are separated and were/are in the process of working it all out when this hit, i'm 38 and had a mastectomy in november. we are wildly attracted to each other and have a great sex life so i was so concerned. i've talked to him about it a lot and he's been so great about it, he never missed a beat with the mast, changed bandages, emptied drains, kissed it "better" etc. he keeps telling me he doesn't make love to my hair and things like that so i still feel pretty good about intimacy so far, but don't want to give anymore of myself to cancer. you really really made my day as i thought i was being naive that i could keep things going. you made me believe again!!!!!! and by the way, GO GIRL, RAH RAH RAH! dh had a brief affair many years ago which lead to a separation long afterwards because i couldn't let it go. anyhow i got me a youngin too (too get back at him) While we both realize now how stupid we were, that "kid" showed me a trick or two, and sure made me smile! ah, BC, the things i'm learning, and the things i've finally accepted! hard way to learn a few lessons, but might be worth it after all, especially if i can hang on to a little MOJO! thank-you so much janis...shel

  • Claiire
    Claiire Member Posts: 60
    edited December 2005

    just bumping this to the top for JenQ

  • Bancroft
    Bancroft Member Posts: 14
    edited December 2005

    my mojo never disappeared, but got buried a little...

  • Marcia320
    Marcia320 Member Posts: 22
    edited January 2006
    I have to say this is one of the most interesting threads on this site. However, I think I may have spent WAY too much time reading all of the posts over Christmas break. I went back to work today and we had to change the toner cartridge on our new copier. I thought I would just die laughing when I took it out of the box - it was a huge ridged cylinder with a bright orange rounded tip!! It sure wasn't a pocket rocket . Good thing that I opened it up before the tech guy came to show me how it goes in the machine - I thought I would be a bit more dignified - well, that didn't work - all of the jokes and comments just kept coming from all of the co-workers! What a hoot. I think I either need more mojo at home or something!! Anyhow, thanks ladies for all of the information (and some laughs) you've provided
  • FitChik
    FitChik Member Posts: 392
    edited January 2006
    Claire...Checked out Nite Time Toys...good stuff! Ordered a Rabbit (finally!), 'Orgasm Balls' (they sound intriguing!) and a cock ring with wireless vibrator- the small vibrator is like a small bullet and inserts on top of the cock ring. Has anyone tried this type of gadget? I think that Elexa makes a condom with a similar feature (the vibrator). Anyone? If not, I'll let y'all know how it goes!
    Oh and BTW, my horniness has only increased since BC. It started with hair and skin changes from chemo that made my skin oh-so-sensitive. Once I got off on that, fireworks started! Maybe it's the physical trigger combined with the psychological mindset?
  • SpanArtist
    SpanArtist Member Posts: 38
    edited January 2006
    Hi FitChik,

    I tried one of those cock rings w/ the small vibrator on the top YEARS ago (with a lesbian partner who was wearing a dildo!) and it worked very well back then, but that was before BC and the low hormones of the here and now. Also, as I remember, she had to get in just the right position and not move too much...don't know how that would work with a real male in the throes of passion!! Worth a try, though!

    Good Luck!
    Hugs, Liza
  • FitChik
    FitChik Member Posts: 392
    edited January 2006
    Liza...Somehow the term 'throes of passion' applied to a male in the process doesn't seem apt. I'm thinking it wouldn't be too difficult to get a guy to avoid the bump 'n grind and just aim straight (lol- no offense ) at the target. My order was mailed out today. I'll let y'all know how the toys are workin'
  • SpanArtist
    SpanArtist Member Posts: 38
    edited January 2006
    Hi again Fitchik,

    "Somehow the term 'throes of passion' applied to a male in the process doesn't seem apt."

    Not sure what you mean by that, unless you mean males aren't passionate, which doesn't fit my experience...I slept with about 50 guys before coming out 30 years ago. I may not have felt passion, but they did! What I meant was that it would be harder for a guy to stop moving and be still in just the right position, if he's aroused (I mean, he's feeling something...a dildo feels nothing). And a bullet is small, so if he moves around too much, the bullet could very easily miss your target. Anyway, again, good luck. The guys I was with way back then were all young too (20s), so maybe an older guy could control himself better.

    Hugs, Liza
  • jaybird627
    jaybird627 Member Posts: 1,227
    edited January 2006
    Thanks, Claiire, for the condom info. I have not needed them as my young man is back in my life and we don't use condoms as I'm post-menopausal. I rather hate them, anyway,
    and only have a few around just-in-case-for-the-future. I'll definitely check out the ribbed ones, though, should I find myself looking for another partner.

    As for men moving or not moving and hitting targets, if they stop moving for too long they'll lose their erection so they have to move every so often. Well, in my experience anyway. With me taking A LOT longer now to orgasm I find that the second time around he can last longer and then I can get my goodies! Younger is definitely better!
  • Mena
    Mena Member Posts: 263
    edited January 2006

    Hey ladies....so happy to see this thread thriving.....bumping it up for a really cool newbie. Have fun Vanessa!! Remember to go back to Page 1.

  • jaybird627
    jaybird627 Member Posts: 1,227
    edited January 2006
    Hey Mena! Thanks for starting this thread in the first place!

    I was SO down from my BC treatments and not having a sex drive (still don't have one but CAN get excited with the right person!) and this thread gave me a bit of hope. Didn't think I'd get my mojo back (it's not the same) but I did. Hope is what gets us through this I think.

    Is all well with you?

    Janis L
  • casinogirl
    casinogirl Member Posts: 476
    edited January 2006
    Hi all - I went shopping yesterday morning with the laptop and ordered a Hitachi w/ the attachment package AND a Wascally Wabbit....I'll report in after I get my toys. I know alot on this board have lots of good things to say about the Hitachi Magic Wand, so I can't wait to play with that one!

    Here's to good mojo for all!

    Donna
  • jaybird627
    jaybird627 Member Posts: 1,227
    edited January 2006
    So now we're waiting on Marin AND Donna to report back on their findings. Ladies, do not let us down!

    My fear (not really a fear but I had to type that) is that the toys would replace my man/future men. After all, sex (a good and satisfying orgasm) is definitely something to look forward to in life, right? And if I can get it better from a hand-held device do I even need a man in my life? Just a thought. I DO like my Zestra and pocket rocket though...

    Janis L
  • FitChik
    FitChik Member Posts: 392
    edited January 2006
    Speaking of needing a man, I need some advice from you wise chicks. My 'bf' has not been showing much appreciation or even consideration for me lately. He is totally obsessed with sports and especially football. Also, his libido has never come close to matching mine but, due to his aforementioned expertise with his highly athletic tongue, I've ignored the negatives. Now though I'm feeling irritated, squirmy and just anxious to break free. He doesn't want to share/have multiple partners, so if I break with him, that's it. I am sooooo undecided as to which way to go...should I settle for great sex when HE is in the mood (like once a week ) or embark on a new search, relying on the mechanical toys that I'm still awaiting and my former 'FBs' in the meantime? What would you all do?
  • Claiire
    Claiire Member Posts: 60
    edited January 2006

    My thoughts on this are that it is better to have good sex once per week than none at all. Toys and FBs may work for a while.

    How are things between you otherwise? If the love / affection isn't there, to me that is a different thing all together. Football season is almost over... are you a football widow or a total sports widow?

    I have one friend that has 4 men right now... She complained to me on the phone last night of having to much sex!!!!!

    I think I barely have 1/8th of a man. I'm about to dump what little I have of him and go looking again. As a FB he isn't even "coming through"

    In the mean time my toys are there and I've decided I'm not going to just settle.

    Did any of that make any sense??
  • Pharmmom
    Pharmmom Member Posts: 18
    edited January 2006
    I have a "physical problem" question. Despite. KY Jelly, and vagifem basically alot of lube during sex, I still end up with some bleeding afterward. What is up with that????? Anyone else? I am talking this happens everytime! I was diagnosed with the atrophy, I had the ovaries out and am on Arimidex. I kind of was hoping that this problem would resolve itself since I was doing everything I thought I had to do to get rid of it. Advice??

    Barb
  • jaybird627
    jaybird627 Member Posts: 1,227
    edited January 2006
    Barb, perhaps some of the things you're using are more irritating than not? Most lubes have chemicalized ingredients. My gyne recommended pure vitamin E as a moisturizer (which I don't seem to need anymore but I do use it once in the morning when my vagina is dry) and baby oil for intercourse, which I haven't tried. I also use Pro-Gest by Emerita (paraben free). The chemo-induced menopause and Tamoxifen really dried me out but I seem to be fine now and have no problems with intercourse. I probably haven't helped but I do wish you better times!

    Janis L
  • jaybird627
    jaybird627 Member Posts: 1,227
    edited January 2006
    Marin, it sounds like you're ready to move on, sex or no sex. If everything else is great then stick with him but if you want more then go find a man who will give you more. There's no reason to settle.

    Janis L
  • sue4unj
    sue4unj Member Posts: 48
    edited January 2006
    My suggestion -- try Unscented Albolene Moisturizing Cleanser -- it works like a charm. My husband and I used it before b/c and continue to use it while I'm on chemo.
    Sue (NJ)
  • casinogirl
    casinogirl Member Posts: 476
    edited January 2006
    Marin - maybe bf feels the same as you, but is also afraid of bringing it up? Have you asked him if something is on his mind because he seems less engaged lately?

    I guess good mojo once a week is better is better than no good mojo...but it sounds like maybe you've started to move on mentally.

    Donna
  • Mena
    Mena Member Posts: 263
    edited January 2006
    Hi ladies....this is to pharmom.....I'd have that bleeding checked out just because well, better safe than sorry....

    Have you tried Replens? Way back when, when I was still married, I used Replens and it helped a lot. You insert it vaginally and it is absorbed by the tissue in the vaginal walls. It's good for two or three days.Then you just insert a fresh one. It's been so fricken long (10 months), but I do remember that it worked for me. I used it together with KY Warming Liquid. It certainly won't hurt, literally, to try it.

    Go for it and let us know how it goes.

    Who just bought the Hitachi Magic Wand? It's by far the best investment I've made as far as toys go. Have fun.....xo
  • Pharmmom
    Pharmmom Member Posts: 18
    edited January 2006
    Hi

    Thanks for the advice. I will try that Vitamin E. I think its "lack of use". I have had it checked out and its just dryness. It is a very small amt of light blood from the "friction" if you will. Its not an actual bleeding like a period. The information here is great. Thanks very much ladies.

    Barb
  • FitChik
    FitChik Member Posts: 392
    edited January 2006
    Update on my bf issue. I e-mailed him and was completely honest about feeling 'unspecial' and bored and asked what his take was. We got together for lunch and he admitted feeling kinda the same. We agreed to be 'friends' and will even use upcoming basketball tickets we had bought (hey, it's Duke and TN women!). I feel sad, but relieved and free. Also kinda scared. My plan is to get back with my boy toys until someone comes along with promise for more. 'Just sex' isn't too bad!
  • iodine
    iodine Member Posts: 869
    edited January 2006

    GO VOLS!!!!

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