You know youre a cancer patient when....
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YKYACPW you get excited about eating something other than a milkshake!! usually it's the other way around
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YKYACPW someone writes
Merry Christmas, have you finished chemo yet? on your face book page.
it was a jolt back to reality.
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....you go to meet a friend at out-patient surgery and all the staff say..."oh no, we didn't know you were on the schedule again"....try to tellt hem you are here for a friend and they all smile with relief.
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YKYACPW you really, really want people to understand that it's grade and not stage that makes a difference!!!! It always comes to a head every couple of months on the boards, on who is "better" and who is "worse" off. It's like they want to be the worst off or something! Doi!!
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YKYACPW...........you're at a Christmas party and the drunk guy in the corner keeps talking about your beautiful curls, to shut him up I introduced myself as DH's wife, he knows him. Drunk guy keeps on about the hair, the beautiful curls, color, etc. The next time you walk past to get a drink, he then asks.........are the curls natural - you've finally had enough and say NO, it's CHEMO hair. Thinking, this will shut him up - nope his drunk ass still keeps going.........tells me that since I was bald I should grow a fro. Really???? I finally walked away and decided to send someone else in my place next time I needed something.
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Barb - one day my survivor friends and I discovered that despite the fact that we're in different stages, we're all grade 3! Scary!
Blossom - sorry to hear about your boyfriend. You've been through a lot. And I would be pissed if someone tore off my wig!
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I don't know if it is okay to post this here? My grade is 3, what does that mean. I know it is about disorganized, probably rebellious cancer cells. I don't know what it mans bey9ond that. Barbe, Kittycat, anyone?
Ginger
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Grade 3 is faster growing and can be more aggressive. Therefore, I'd rather be Stage III and Grade 1, than Stage I and Grade 3. Once you are diagnosed it is under control, it's the part before you're diagnosed and it's growing that matters!
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Grade 1 is not a magic bullet. :-(
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Susan_02143 I am sorry to hear that. I sure wish there was more knowledge for the doctors to work with. I thought 0 nodes was better and apparently that isn't always true. We need a cure!
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NO stage is a magic bullet! We are all cancer patients...some just crankier than others!
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oh dear... was I cranky. Sorry bout that.... But, I do feel a bit cranky. Maybe I need to make some chocolate-covered pretzels! :-)
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EVERYONE is cranky today!!!! It's a disease worse than cancer ALL over the threads....sigh.
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Gingerbrew: The grade number tells how much or different from the original cells the cancer cells ar and how fast they are dividing. Grade 1 cells are cancerous, but look very much like the original cells. Grade 3 cells are cancerous cells that do not look at all like the original cells. Cells that look much like the original cells but are dividing rapidly will be graded higher. Generally speaking, the higher the grade the more likely the cells are to be aggressive, but that is a generality
The stage is determined by the amount or potential of spread to distant parts of the body and it based on 3 things: the size of the tumor, the number of lymph nodes with cancer cells in them, and evidence of spread to distant sites. If there is evidence of spread, the stage is 4 no matter what size the tumor is and weather or not the lymph nodes have any cancerous cells. Smaller tumors are staged at lower numbers, with Stage 0 meaning that there is no evidence the cancer has spread outside the duct or lobule where it started. In breast cancer, a combination of small tumor plus a positive node or a larger tumor plus negative nodes is stage 2. Generally, the higher the stage, the more likely the cancer will recurr or pop up in a distant site in the future.
As to what grade/stage combo is better than another--it's a moot point. Grading is very subjective. The same sample graded by 3 pathologists will often result in 3 different grade numbers being assigned.Stage is based more on fact than opinion, but it's only a snapshot of the situation at the time of diagnosis. Women can, and do, move from Stage 1 to Stage 4 on the basis of the findings of one single scan. Someone here on the boards has said that we are all one test away from Stage 4 status. We don't gradually go from stage 1 to stage 2 to stage 3 to stage 4, we go from our stage at diagnosis to stage 4 when a metastasis is found.
It's human nature to want to know what is going to happen when we get a cancer diagnosis, and we often look to the grade/stage info to do that. And it's also human nature to get cranky when we realize that our "better" grade/stage numbers are not a protection against future findings.
We do so need a cure. We need to put a stop to the wasting of money on awareness campaigns and "save the ta-tas" campaigns, and find a fu($ing cure already. There, I've had my cranky moment, too!
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NM, thank you for that amazingly clear explanation. Yes, we can tell you're a nurse involved in education!
I actually feel as if I did move from Stage I to II to III to IV, but that's not based on facts but on emotions. Before surgery it looked like the nodes were clear so I thought I was Stage I. After surgery I found out about the 6 nodes. I REFUSED to ask my onc how he staged me and called myself Stage II based on one site I read (even though other sites staged it differently) because I was too afraid to look at it any other way. A few months after my active treatment finished I finally asked my onc & he said Stage III. Then came The Scan and I am now Stage IV.
I'm cranky, too, so BRING ON THE CHOCOLATE COVERED PRETZELS!
All the best.
Leah
P.S. YKYACP when you decide that chocolate covered pretzels are good for you.
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NM thank you for such a clear explanation.
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Leah--medical staging is one thing, emotional reactions are totally another! I remember trying to figure out my stage before the lumpectomy and SNB, even though I knew I wouldn't get an actual diagnostic staging until then. What the emotions need and do have nothing to do with facts and reality sometimes. Sometimes I think it would be easier if the staging did go up gradually, giving time to get used to the changes a bit at a time.
Personally, I don't like pretzels and thnk chocolate covered pretzels are a waste of good chocolate, but hey, whatever floats your boat! I'll stick to hot chocolate, chocolate covered nuts, chocolate covered fruit,and pretend it's all good. I just got this water bottle for myself:
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NM, I love that water bottle!
Also - as long as you go for the chocolate, you can use it to cover everything. We have a good friend who loves garlic and also loves chocolate. For years he would make jokes about eating chocolate covered garlic. One year my daughters decided to make him some for his birthday - he loved it! They cooked the garlic cloves in the microwave, mixed them with melted chocolate chips and put it in molds & hardened it.
One of my granddaughters doesn't like chocolate. How did she end up in my family? And how will she cope with life as she gets older? She's almost 3 so hasn't had major stress yet. Aside from that she seems a normal and intelligent child!
All the best.
Leah
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love the water bottle, I too am a confirmed chocoholic. Where did you find it? My DD is one too, genetic link? Karen p.s. A good genetic link
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leah I love the comment on your granddaughter "how will she cope?" too funny
As to the posts about staging, personally I didn't think anyone sounded cranky! Maine, you did an excellent job in that description, thanks. I never remember my grade for some reason. I was going to go look it up when I was reading those posts cause I know where my path report is, but then wondered what the point would be - knowing it won't change it!
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Now that they say dark chocolate is good for us we need a minimum daily requirement. I think mine must be at least a pound.
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Mine is gradual movement up the bc scale. I started in 2009 at a Stage 0 and grade 2. Then, got bc again despite my extreme efforts to prevent it. So my last staging was Stage 1, grade 3. I hope this all stops!!!!
YKYACP when you find out your friend can't get chemo because her counts are low and you want to go yell at the onco's office. Instead you phone a bc survivor friend and vent!
YKYACP when you decide to curl up at home and use rads or any other bc reason to do so!!
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chabba - what is that in your profile pic?
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I'm not sure of the kind but it is a shell from one of the local beaches.
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YKYACPW after all the crap you've been through this last year. Chemo, rads, surgery, recon, etc. You decide to do a drug trial for another year. Have diarrhea for that year (biggest side effect)just to make sure to keep the beast away longer. Joined the Neratinib trial...hoping to have a longer time in between a recurrences.
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I, me, was the one who was cranky!!!
I, me, was also the one who is know to say we are all one test away from a Stage IV diagnosis!
YKYACPW you don't mind admitting when you are the cranky one!
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Leah-your granddaughter still has time for the latent chocolate loving gene to show up, in the meantime, maybe a paternity test is in order????? (j/k)
Karen-I found the water bottle at Café Press (www.cafepress.com) Now they've got one that I want even more:
YKYARCPW you don't even try to make up excuses for consuming your 2 favorite foods: coffee and chocolate.!
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NM, it wouldn't help - she's my daughter's daughter.
Yes, I already wondered if they made a mistake in the hospital. Only if someone else also has a kid who looks exactly like my daughter now living in their house.
Pass the chocolate pretzels please.
Leah
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LOL!
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Your mug reminds me of the way Bill Cosby explained how chocolate cake is good for you. I have used that explaination myself to turn any food into a vegetable.
A cow is a vegetable. How? He eats grass. Grass is a plant. Vegetables comes from plants. So red meat is just a vegetable.
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