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OMG They Found the Cure for Stupid

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  • thefuzzylemon
    thefuzzylemon Member Posts: 631

    Thank you! I will fill in the missing positions soon! I knew I clucked up!! Clucking Chemo Brain...there is also a babysitting position open (for me)...they pay is terrible but the clucking entertainment is worth it!!

  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 1,605

    Can I drop off my cluckin kids too?

  • Ellie1959
    Ellie1959 Member Posts: 73
    Do not bitch about your aureola's being to high - I had nipples created (no tatoo's) and one kind of disappeared on the left side and is way over - My husband always tells me nipples are over-rated but I always kind of missed mine - oh well - such is life. EllieEmbarassed
  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 10,618

    I don't have any cluckin little kids anymore, but if the ones in the babysitting department get out of hand, I can deal with them.  It's part of security, you know?

  • janet in virginia
    janet in virginia Member Posts: 923

    Fuzzy - I'll donate Chicken Little book so you can read to them before nap time.

  • tinkertude
    tinkertude Member Posts: 1,998

    well said sas   some people are so cluckin stupid!!!!!

  • Ellie1959
    Ellie1959 Member Posts: 73
    My life has been pretty clucked up lately - and this thread is the best remedy! Please count me in role call - CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK - puff, puff, cluck, pass - I'm in Iowa - bye the bye - and there are some major Dumb Cluck's around Dubuque - let me clue you - Cool Also, don't hate me because I'm pink - it was a facebook pic - hate me because I'm so many other obnoxious things - and I like my picture~
  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 1,605

    we could read the llittle cluckers this book too....

  • beccad
    beccad Member Posts: 189

    OK, Meece, do I need to bring the 9mm Glock, or the big guns?  I may have access to a shotgun or 2 we could use bird shot in those for warnings, then there is the 22 caliber rifle, and possible one of those "black military style" rifles.

    Also, I will also bring the coffee, diet pepsi, wine, and the asparagus and  bacon appetizers.  Maybe the brownies also.  

    puff, puff, pass 

  • janet in virginia
    janet in virginia Member Posts: 923

    And a couple of shoulder fired missle launchers in case any black helicopters start circling.

  • Lowrider54
    Lowrider54 Member Posts: 333

    This thread has been my 'Land of D'Nile' rather than a month and half's worth of scanxiety - yep, they scheduled my full body bone scan that far out so...Thank you to all my Mother Cluckers for supporting me throughout all the covert operations and those yet to come during what could have been scanxiety major - what a fabulous diversion!

    Update...as I am heading south, I have started hitting pretty heavy updrafts, hail, I have hail...lookout, now I have debris...lots of debris...oh no, rain, heavy rain...oh crap, I can't see anything...cluck, cluck, cluck - if a tornado drops, I won't see it, it will be rain wrapped - wish I could hook up with a chase team - I don't like being out here alone.  OMG, its gonna drop right on me................gotta go

  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 1,605

    Glad this thread is helping to pass the time Low.  Waiting clucks!

  • momof2greatkids
    momof2greatkids Member Posts: 7

    OMG where the cluck have you ladies been all my life?

     Just discovered this clucking thread - it sure the cluck would have helped the past 8 months! 

    Just got back from chemo and look what I wrote to someone- anyone else clucking feel this way after?(and it was just clucking Herceptin! All the cluckin nasty chemo ended cluckin 4 months ago) Here is the email (edited out the not-so-clucking -funny parts).

    [and btw the Mac below is my dog that has gotten on my last cluckin nerve. He has become vicious and I may have to put him down which cluckin breaks my heart.]

    To:-------

    Subject: Mac better look out tonight

    Had chemo, got here short while ago.
    I don't know why, but after I am SOOOO grumpy/depressed/and not violent but kind of like I am not taking shit from anyone. . Like not ... (which makes no sense since im fighting like a...) ... then I said to myself what the heck, I'm going to Hell anyhow. Geez.

    Then when I first got here, there was no parking - not even in the 15 min zone. On way back over, there is a stupid "hybrid (which is why I am sure they feel entitled) in a Handicap spot without a tag. I seriously had to hold myself back from doing something I shouldn't do. WTF???

    So, now I am trashed. Gotta chill, pull my bootstraps up and snap out of it and get my sorry ass to work n hope to foggeddabout all this stuff.

    Oh, yeah, so my main point was not taking shit from anyone - so Mac better look the hell out when I get home. (please don't call doggie cps!)

    Ok I feel better now that I have vented! Gee, you're great xxx! YOU DA xxxx THAT DESERVES a 1/4m raise!

    -----

    And now I cluckin feel 100 cluckin times better beause of you ladies!!!!!!!!!!!!! Back to work with a [cluckin fake] smile I go! 

    Venting sure helps! Thank you, and have a clucking fantastic day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 1,605

    Mom, Great vent!!  But you wrote WTF..... did you mean WTC???

  • Kymn
    Kymn Member Posts: 887

    Laugh my cluckin head off gotta love the fake cluckin smile i am sure we are all pro's at it now

  • momof2greatkids
    momof2greatkids Member Posts: 7

    Makraz - ha ha ha ha! Just snuck a peek at the board on break - thank you!! That will get me through the rest of the day!

  • Lowrider54
    Lowrider54 Member Posts: 333

    Wow, you guys are not going to believe this!  I was in the core of the tornado - thankfully, it was just barely an EF-1 so I only got pushed around a little bit but once the rain cleared, there sat the TIVE right in front of me with the rest of the Storm Chasers coming up the road.  OMG...I am going to get to fulfill an item on my bucket list ( I haven't lost the mission - just a little detour is all) - I am going to spend the rest of the day with the Storm Chasers.  With all this rain down south here, most of Dog's markings have washed away so I will have to wait for some good intel to get back on his tail.  And with real tornadoes, it will conserve my canned ones.  The Storm Chaser guys did look at me a little funny when my tin foil hat peeked out a bit under the 'cover' hat and I had to grab some Bounty rolls, small garlic bulbs (no more elephant garlic thank you), the asparagus, and the bacon - the chickens should be fine until I get back to my vehicle - its parked in the shade with the sun roof flipped up a little and the other windows down just enough so the don't escape.  I kinda hid it, just in case the Animal Patrol comes by - they have plenty of food, water, and grit and they are better layers than they are cluckers so they shouldn't draw too much attention.

    Will be out of communication for a little bit but please post any intel on Dog's location and if he has a lead on the Cancer Cure Guy.  I have narrowed it down to potentially 2 labs - AstraZeneca and GenTec.  That TDM1 flub with the one trial participant being disqualified was an inside sabatoge as that got fast tracked and the FDA was all set to give the stamp of approval - I smell a rat in that one - thank goodness they let them go right back to trial and still fast tracked it - so, where the heck is GenTec?  Oh, I will find it, I have to either meet up with Dog or head back home and get set to go undercover after I am done storm chasing so I can pick up my GPS - I know, I know, I need to get a blackberry...but smart phones have the GPS and the new 4G's have great internet - I am just partial to the Droid...

    Later, I am getting to ride in the TIVE....woo hoo!

  • beccad
    beccad Member Posts: 189

    I am not sure where to find the clucking Shoulder fired missle launcher.  I could ask the DH, but then would have to clucking explain what it was needed for. (Lucy, you have some splaning to do.) that was in my best Ricky Ricardo voice.

    Oh, BTW, I will not be carrying these clucking weapons.

     

  • beccad
    beccad Member Posts: 189

    Oh, wait the clucking pink Taurus PT-22 is kinda cute in a clucked up sorta way.

  • thegood5
    thegood5 Member Posts: 284
    "Dog's sidekick? 
  • thegood5
    thegood5 Member Posts: 284
    Funny Dogs Pictures, Images and PhotosI think we have some competition in trying to find the CG...."
  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 1,605

    That's just clucking wrong!

  • janet in virginia
    janet in virginia Member Posts: 923

    Whew Low.  That was close!  I did hear some good news - cure guy has been put on the no fly list.  He was caught smoking asparagus in the plane lavatory.   So we know he's on the ground SOMEWHERE.  I sent you night vision goggles via fedex to a truck stop somewhere near you - let me know when you get them.

    fuzzy - new rule?  pink is banned in the henhouse.

  • beccad
    beccad Member Posts: 189

    Makraz, Which ones? The clucking weapons or the clucking poodles?

  • janet in virginia
    janet in virginia Member Posts: 923

    Grandma?  Is that you?????

  • beccad
    beccad Member Posts: 189

    One quick question?  Where would a person ever need pink clucking camoflauge?  I have always wondered about that.

  • Lowrider54
    Lowrider54 Member Posts: 333

    beccad..during Pink October?  Just a thought...

  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 10,618

    Those weapons are cluckin awesome!!!

    I was thinkin' flame thrower, but shot guns with birdshot should pull everyone in line.

    Don't you wear pink cammo during Clucktober?  Some people would just like to fade into the background during that month.

  • thegood5
    thegood5 Member Posts: 284

    beccad, to HIDE, silly!

  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 1,605

    The poodles!  Grandma is that you?  Too cluckin' funny!

    Check the Frito Lay factorys for CC Guy.  He may have the munchies and is hiding out there.

    Pink Camo?  I don't cluckin' know!