Stupid comments ....

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Comments

  • Beachbum1023
    Beachbum1023 Member Posts: 364
    edited April 2015

    Pu241, GREAT now I can't come back as a shark either. Had enough of this crap already! Thanks for the info. Any news on those naked mole rats? That would be just my luck..........ugh! Cheryl

  • Pu241
    Pu241 Member Posts: 2
    edited April 2015
  • Beachbum1023
    Beachbum1023 Member Posts: 364
    edited April 2015

    Pu241, I am cracking up! Only a cancer patient would wonder about that, but just in case I am going to read that. I just hope I have the choice, I was hoping to be a Princess or something fun! Have a great night! Cheryl

  • sillyplatypus
    sillyplatypus Member Posts: 2
    edited April 2015

    SelenaWolf,

    I really needed that laugh. Thank you! :) Early on, I got one person who said, "You know there's a cure, right? Just go on YouTube and watch the videos. Don't let them give you any of that chemo stuff...it's just a scam." Huh. Who knew?

    I guess one of my most "helpful" comments came from my well-meaning aunt. When I was first diagnosed, she said, "I know just how you feel! I had a lump once. Thank goodness it was just a cyst." Um, no, you don't know just how I feel, and I hope you never do.

    My poor mother had a couple of worse comments when she was going through chemo for non-smoker's lung cancer. When she was talking about how she missed her hair, someone said, "You won't care that you're bald when you're in the grave." Another helpful person called her to describe, in great and terrifying detail, about the night her husband had died from the same disease. "I just thought you'd like to know what to expect," she said.

    Naked mole rats rock, BTW, but I definitely wouldn't want to snack on them (despite their so-called anti-cancer super sugars--yup, had to go do some quick research on the wee beasties).

  • Leah_S
    Leah_S Member Posts: 1,929
    edited April 2015

    Well, I'm disappointed about the sharks. Sigh. At least we can rely on the naked mole rats. Maybe we should get them some clothes, as a gesture of gratitude.

    Sillyplatypus, I absolutely canNOT fathom what would make someone want to describe her husband's death so your mother would "know what to expect".

    Leah

  • sillyplatypus
    sillyplatypus Member Posts: 2
    edited April 2015

    Leah, now I'm imagining naked mole rats sashaying down the runway, modeling the clothes that we all got for them. :)

  • tangandchris
    tangandchris Member Posts: 934
    edited April 2015

    People are so dumb....that is all.

  • RaiderGirl
    RaiderGirl Member Posts: 235
    edited April 2015

    Recent stupid comment " So its all over for you now?"

    Yes I said, its all over except for the adjunctive therapy, the side effects, the quarterly blood test, the painful mammos, the endless expenses and the relentless fear and sadness. Other than those, its all over.

  • glennie19
    glennie19 Member Posts: 4,833
    edited April 2015


    RG:  I've had that one too.  Nope,, not over,,, mammo or MRI every 6 months,,, lymphedema forever to deal with,,,blood tests, etc etc,,,  I don't believe it will ever be "over",,, hopefully easier to deal with???

  • RaiderGirl
    RaiderGirl Member Posts: 235
    edited April 2015

    Glennie19

    All I can think of is that they want it to be over. So they assume that unless I look like I am at deaths door, then it must be over.

    Lately, when asked anything I usually say "Im doing well, thank you for asking".

    I realized that they are just not going to understand.

    On this forum however, I say what I feel.


  • glennie19
    glennie19 Member Posts: 4,833
    edited April 2015


    I think you are right,, they want it to be over.  We are easier to deal with if we are well.  Sometimes it is best to just only tell a few selected people.  And then rant on the forum!

  • farmerjo
    farmerjo Member Posts: 239
    edited April 2015


    One of my patients asked me "Did they get it all?" No one (other than BC patients) will ever, ever understand.

  • eheinrich
    eheinrich Member Posts: 6
    edited April 2015

    I like "at least they caught it early" - I guess since I'm not dead people assume it was early. I've also heard about how big pharma is hiding the cure because they make money on chemo. As a former cancer researcher I gotta say that that makes no sense. My MIL told me the other day that her niece (who is in her 70s) has THE WORST kind of cancer - uterine. Ummm - not true & it's the worst kind to her because it's what she has. Don't diminish what I'm going through at 46. Blech.

    Over.....huh? I'm only 1/2 way done w/ chemo and am really afraid of the possibility of recurrence. Fortunately I've had way more support than stupidity tossed my way.


  • RaiderGirl
    RaiderGirl Member Posts: 235
    edited April 2015

    Ehenrich

    Caught it early means before the cancer is everywhere but to anyone with BC we want nothing to have to catch to begin with.

    Sorry there is still a way to go for you. I hope it passes as quickly as possible.

    If we begin thinking that pharma is hiding a cure, than we will believe that MO keeps patients sick for $, and that labs and imaging make up things for $. Its a terrible hamster to get in the head and its must be killed now before its goes round, and round...

    The worse cancer ever is any cancer on a child.

  • tjh
    tjh Member Posts: 272
    edited April 2015

    I too have much more support than stupid comments...The only one I got was from my MIL and SIL...."It's a good thing they only have to take one breast". Hubby responded for me, nothing I could say the day before surgery would be printable. I forgave my MIL, she is 95 with significant dementia, in Memory Care. SUL is just an idiot.

  • kittysister
    kittysister Member Posts: 88
    edited April 2015

    Sounds like your SIL needs to become more educated! I'm glad you got more support than stupid comments, at least. (((Gentle Hugs)))

  • NCDi
    NCDi Member Posts: 61
    edited April 2015

    KBellaK:

    I was diagnosed a few weeks ago and got masses of info from my team... One pamphlet said to remove toxic people from your life as they are detrimental.

    Toxic people think of themselves and, for the rest of us, don't think. Then again, I have been accused of being a "little self absorbed" who knew, eh

  • NCDi
    NCDi Member Posts: 61
    edited April 2015

    Larkspur: on the shark thing I just read they urinate through their skin as they don't have urinary tracts.

    Mmmmmmm yummy, let's ALL increase our intake of shark eh? Lol!

  • tjh
    tjh Member Posts: 272
    edited April 2015

    1 goal I made after I stopped mentally beating myself up for every questionable thing that I did, ate, took, drank, smelled, smoked, etc or the fact that my BMI is considered obese (40 pounds overweight ) was to eat/cook better. ...But shark is not on my bucket list☺

  • larkspur
    larkspur Member Posts: 19
    edited April 2015

    Sharks pee through their skin?! Who knew?


  • hopeful82014
    hopeful82014 Member Posts: 887
    edited April 2015

    "Sharks pee through their skin?! Who knew?"

    See, bc really does make us better people - look at everything we're learning. (Tongue FIRMLY in cheek)

  • farmerjo
    farmerjo Member Posts: 239
    edited April 2015

    NCDI- I heard the same thing about purging toxic people from our lives, and I did just that.

  • vettegirl
    vettegirl Member Posts: 136
    edited April 2015

    So yesterday I was doing my preop at the hospital and this RN says to me"Isnt it just great what they can do with masectomy breasts these days?".  I stopped her in her tracks.  Me-"not really-I am disappointed that they havent come further in reconstruction.  I hope that those in the future dont have to get their breasts mangled so badly during a masectomy, get bricks for boobs, and all this scarring.'  I went on to tell her how this is awful, that men hate fake boobs anyways, they like soft and squishys not bricks.  That we dont even want to look at ourselves in the mirror, let alone let anyone else look at us.  Told her how it affects our sex life-no estrogen, dryness,blah blah blah.  All she could say when i got done talking was "thank you for sharing, i had no idea."  Yep-most of you dont, just think we are getting a free pair of boobs. 

  • farmerjo
    farmerjo Member Posts: 239
    edited April 2015

    Thank you, VetteGirl -

    My words EXACTLY.

  • tjh
    tjh Member Posts: 272
    edited April 2015

    I have heard the new boob phrase enough to make me want to puke. One the other hand...my 34 yr old son texted this AM for an update. I told him I was getting stronger and on Friday I find out my Onco score to see if I need chemo. Hopine and praying not, but he said if I need chemo he would do it with me😆

  • hopeful82014
    hopeful82014 Member Posts: 887
    edited April 2015
    Good for you, VetteGitl.
  • mel147
    mel147 Member Posts: 291
    edited April 2015

    Vettegirl - wow - that was a great response!! Glad you took the time to educate that nurse on the reality of reconstruction so she will be better informed now and will know not to make those kinds of comments again!

  • kittysister
    kittysister Member Posts: 88
    edited April 2015

    I got the "we all have cancer cells" comment, too. That's easy enough to say when you aren't facing surgery, treatments, or worse.

  • RaiderGirl
    RaiderGirl Member Posts: 235
    edited April 2015

    KittySitter '

    My reply to We All Have Cancer Cells. Do you want to trade yours for mine?

    Their eyes OO

  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 15,894
    edited April 2015


    Raider, Lurker here-------------totally love your sense of humor  and irony. Girl you are the cat's MEoooOOw.