My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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I can say personally, when it comes to the cancer side of things, I am not a complainer. I will complain about skin cracks in the winter or stubbing my toe. Having the chest port accessed or needles do not bug me at all. I've always lived an almost hermit type of quiet life due to bullying in elementary and high school, not many friends so being indoors does not bug me. I also want all of us to stop saying we are being whiny. We just have other things whether health or thing happening in real life that can pile on as well. I can understand the need to have positivity in some of the posts though as it would be tough to deal with depressive posts regularly.
I do want to say, Kung Pow movie really did have me cackling away, if I watch it at the cancer clinic while waiting will need to cover my mouth to avoid the inevitable laughing. It really took me out of a depressive mood which was what I needed. Now I just want a tortilla with peanut butter as a meal with some chips, need stuff that is more simple because I simply do not feel like cooking.
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I’ll take cheese with my whine. !!! I feel like I’m a huge baby ! Love to all
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Hi, everyone. I know I don’t comment often on here, but I am writing today because @sunshine99 wrote me. We converse periodically through email. She has made the hard decision to enter hospice and asked if I would let the group know. Let us all please keep her in our thoughts. Carol, we love you.
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Carol, my sunshine, I am so sad to hear this but at least we know you are comfortable there and surrounded by your family here who are in your pockets and you in our thoughts and prayers. I know your family is around you as well as good friends I am sure that you have had along the way.
News like this is sad but I also feel some bit of comfort know that the person will be kept comfortable until the time comes, I am sorry for all who know her and once she passes, we will all miss her.
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KBL - Thanks so very much for your post. You have done Sunshine and all of us here a very nice favor. I'm really sorry to hear this news and I wish Sunshine/Carol peace, comfort, and hugs. Please keep us posted if it is OK with Carol.
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I slept better last night, woke up and started laundry and budget boosting, got the tv playing ads, my regular phone playing food videos and paying for the ads and am playing games for money as well.
Got those pesky little bugs, not drain flies, guess they are a kind of fruit fly, on high alert to keep food scraps contained and dumping hot water and detergent down all drains regularly, about all I can do. Otherwise, just clobber each one I see, no problem. Planning more basic meals going forward. Just going to play with seasoning etc. Not interested in vegetables I don't and will not eat normally and selectively spending money on stuff I will like beans, lentils and other things. Rice and pasta as well to put eggs and other stuff into.
Edited meal, took frozen pasta, put two eggs on top of it, lots of shredded cheese and some parm that came with one of the salad things I do not like. It was very good. Got leftovers in the fridge. I am keeping the food scraps in containers in the fridge until time to put out garbage, move them in the garbage bag, that will keep drain flies out of kitchen and bathroom drain. I realize that processing the food and putting down the toilet just attracts them. Once I get rid of scraps, I just need to clean out the containers for use later.
I hope everyone does have a good day, we all are feeling bad about the news of Carol to hospice so we will all be in pockets for each other lending support to her.
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Carol,
it's Sunday, and I know your faith runs deep. you've been in my thoughts, so yesterday when I posted here my first priority was to check on you as I hadn’t seen you post recently, but you know this chemo mind… this morning I was going to message you and then I saw KBL’s update about you entering hospice.
you have always been so supportive of everyone. when I was in a panic, you opened your arms with such kindness and comforted me. your heart is truly full of love, and you are deeply loved here. you are in my thoughts, and I wish you comfort.
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Carol, our prayers and thoughts will continue to be with you as you enter hospice. Your courage and sweet spirit has comforted us all during your time on here. May God's peace and rest be with you.
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Carol, as you have long said in words that have inspired me, cancer can't enter your soul. I hope you are surrounded by love, as you are here.
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Oh no - I had noticed she hadn't posted in some time and most recently there was a new development that well, I guess tipped the scales. Whatever the reason, Sunshine/Carol, whatever came your way in the last two years (and it was some hard stuff!) you faced it with grace and humor (although I imagine the anger was saved for offline!) and I hope your sisters here helped buoy you along as well. I wish you the best, most comfortable passage one can hope for, surrounded by your family and your faith. God bless you.
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@kbl - Thank you for sharing this with us. Please, let Carol know that we're sending her all our love and strength during this difficult time.
The Mods
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well that just sucks. Plain and simple. My eyes are filling with tears, i always looked for her posts , she was part of the family. Sunshine shine your own special way to peace. We love you here always
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Sunshine/Carol - reading your posts made my life brighter. My thoughts are with you.
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Thank you all. I have copied and pasted what you’ve said and sent your beautiful words to her.
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Dear @sunshine99 , sending you so much love and gratitude for your presence here on this site. You are in my heart and in my thoughts. I hope that hospice treats you beautifully, and that you have some comfort and peace for as long as possible. ❤️
@kbl thank you so much for sharing. Love to you, too!
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sunshine - when one of us hurts, we all hurt😞. Our sisterhood is what strengthens us. Sending you much love and I pray your days will be peaceful and calm🙏🏻.
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Carol, still in your pocket today, hoping you are comfortable and surrounded by love, we all love you here too.
It has been chilly lately, yesterday turned off both of the AC units. Doing the budget boosting and will be doing laundry. Got garbage to take out, more than 3 because I wimped out of the last garbage day, cannot store any more. We are a multidwelling building so the 3 bag limit does not really apply and it has been more than 4 weeks since I put anything out. I am also testing out the salad spinner on a pair of socks to see if it is capable of getting them clean, just bored I guess. Also
Dealing with those pesky little black bugs, started pouring boiled water down kitchen and bathroom drains and plugging them up to keep stuff in there to a minimum, got apple cider vinegar for the traps to catch the others and smashing the ones that are near me. I don't have a lot but more than 0 are too many, normally see 2 to 3 a day. Making sure all food stuff is in a container and anything being disposed of put in a container until garbage day. Clean and disinfect containers and rinse and repeat.
Edited I got lazy with breakfast, had the tortilla, melted some cheez whiz and added taco seasoning, put that on first and then put some of the canned ham and sour cream. It was a very messy eat and upon opening the ham, cats assumed it was for them. I fed them after I finsished eating. I need to be careful of how much stuff I put in a tortilla though, it all came out the sides. I still enjoyed it though.
Our thoughts are with Carol as well, she should be comfortable and with loved ones as well. We are in her pockets as well sending our love. I am in everyone's pocket as well sending love to everyone here. Have a good day.
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Sorry all, I’m terribly behind and busy in Houston with scans but…
As requested by Micmel, here I am in full chemo glory back in 2017.
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Carol You were always our sunshine here. Your posts were always filled with a humorous twist no matter how bad your situation was. I always enjoyed reading your post and blogs as you truly have a gift to express what we are all feeling. I am typing with tears in my eyes and with a heavy heart as another family member will be taken by this awful disease. Thank you for always being there for all of us. I wish you comfort and peace.
Thanks kbl for letting us know.
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Mae, I do have more hair but I do feel I look like Uncle Fester until wig and makeup are applied, love your picture.
I got all the garbage out that was in the house, three bags, each trip 20 mins apart. Last trip, got tired so storing in outside bin until garbage gets picked up. I look at the garbage calendar and start laughing to myself, tomorrow was supposed to be the night to put out garbage. Due to me putting out trash, my neighbours followed suit, I misled them, I laughed. Labour Day changed the schedule and I missed that somehow. I will be able to empty the bin outside and put those out which is good I think.
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Carol, I always loved your motto of cancer may enter your bones but not your soul. I may have paraphrased that a bit, but the meaning was so deep and profound. It has stayed with me and I borrow it in my mind when things are not going well. You've been a wonderful friend and truly did live up to your nickname 'SUNSHINE''. May you find peace and comfort as you make this journey. Love to you and to your family, too. God bless you. I will miss you..
Laurel
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sunshine99 Carol peace be unto you. Sending hugs. I appreciate you; always encouraging and realistic.
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Carol, still thinking of you and hoping you are in nothing but comfort now with friends and family visiting and somehow feeling all the love everyone has for you here as well.
Doing laundry and thinking about what to have, really thinking of skipping meat unless canned, stick to beans and lentils with some egg and rice, putting different seasonings to make them all different. Also had my fill of tortillas for the time being. Pasta is fine as well. Also planning to chop cooked egg in with croutons to make them the same as the beans. Put far less cheez whiz, still can use the pizza sauce and shredded cheese. or KD cheese sauce as a dry seasoning as well and keep noodles for other meals. Could even see combining dry KD cheese and taco seasoning, would be good I am sure. Iwill see about all that. I decided to try crunchy lentils in some peanut butter since none of my chopping things are free right now. Put breville oven at 425 and will just keep checking, pan well sprayed as well. Mega protein in the meal as well.
I did accidentally put out garbage a day ahead yesterday not accounting for labour day to push everything ahea d. The neighbours followed suit. It will be picked up tomorrow anyway.
Hoping everyone has a good day and in pockets for all who need me and in my own for finishing chores and not leaving things like dishes and laundry half done.
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@illimae, that picture is priceless and put a smile on my face - which was needed after the news of puffin and sunshine. Thank you so much.
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Hi, everyone. Carol let me know she doesn’t have the energy to respond to you all but did say “It’s amazing to read the loving words from others. Love and hugs.”
Thank you all for your beautiful words to her.
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KBL, glad she is in touch with you and is able to read our love coming out to her as well, we all love her and are in her pockets as well.
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Just woke up at noon, did not go to bed late, slept 9 hours and 30mins. Oh well, life goes on. I did have some digestive issues yesterday due to too much fat from peanut butter. Made peanut butter and roasted lentils. At the time it was delicious but a couple hours later the plumbing sprung a big leak. Shut it down and still cleaning the results. Plus side, did not feel sick, will just scale back the fat. I did enjoy the lentils being put in the oven at 425 on a sprayed pan, gave them a good texture. I can see using sour cream and a seasoning to make a good snack. As far as food not sure what I want, perhaps eggs, rice and some of the roasted.
I decided I want Mc D for my first meal, deal for two Quarter Pounders for the price of one, can take the second one and use it for other things. I found a credit on one of my credit cards so with that, the stuff will be near 5.00 which is fine with me. Eat one and put the other in the fridge. Use up within a day or two. I truly enjoyed my lunch and still have more to use up later, not sure how but I will see, whether I use it up today or tomorrow.
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Woke up at noon today, really throws off the schedule but oh well. Did not go to bed late so body must have needed it. I still am thinking about Carol wishing her peace and comfort.
Not going anywhere which is not unusual. Doing extra laundry. I learned that it was not wise to use an overabundance of peanut butter. Made peanut butter and lentils that were crisped in the oven and it was delicious, couple hours later my plumbing started a bad leak and left me a mess, am still washing everything. Just turned off the leak with immodium and learned a good lesson about adding too much fat and sugars to a meal. On the plus side, the crunchy lentils are very good and may start doing that to lentils and the chopped up black beans. I also was not springing a leak to actual Big D so tht was good. Thinking this afternoon, going to make a couple of eggs in with some white rice, add lentils that are roasted after and possibly a small spoon of cheez whiz and sour cream and onion. I will do something with the ham I have later in the fridge for the evening meal and still debating getting rid of the tortillas which I am not really enjoying anymore. I will think about that before actually doing it. Tonight, chopped up black beans and put lentils into a baking pan, will roast them crispy and use sour cream and use the sour cream and onion seasoning as well. Should be good and nutritious.
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Hey Wonderfuls,
I’ve been reading along to catch up on what’s going on.
@mara51506 I love how you make your breakfasts to mix in all the protein and nutrients into patties🥰. You are so creative. Oh and what is Beefless Ground ? What is it made with to substitute the beef? uncle Fester, that’s too funny. I like to put on lipstick also. I bought a nice new red and put it on this morning. Can’t be bothered with the eye make up, but i like just wearing my moisturizer and under eye concealer, a little blush, and light wisp of bronzing powder. My DD & SIL were stopping by to pick up their dog. We were babysitting our “granddog” for a few days while they were on a little 7 year anniversary getaway to Atlantic City Oceans Hotel & Casino. He’s such a good dog, no trouble at all, and my 2 pugs adore him. They are all Little couch potatoes. So I wore the lipstick for when they came over💄💋😉
@micmel Your daughter’s little place is looking good. I’m sure she appreciates you helping her get settled in. We did the same when our DDngother own place. Yes I do feel so bad for young one’s today working and having to pay such high rent.
@candy-678 I too get annoyed when friends or relatives complain about trivial inconveniences, when I feel they are so clueless on what metastic Cancer does to your life. We all get it.take heart dear girl.
@snow-drop I’m in your pocket as you await your results from the tissue biopsy. The wait can be so frustrating. One thing I’m glad for is that I usually get results within a day or two on ‘MY CHART” portal.
@sondraf Sweet girl, I’m glad you’ll ave Mom & Dad with you to spend some time together. My oldest DD is 48 and I would. Be so. Worried about her if she had this damned disease. Our oldest son just turned 50 last month, youngest son just turned 47 last month and our baby daughter is 37. I worry about them all now since I was diagnosed with MBC. Cancer is so. Prevalent. Everyone is getting it these days.🙄
@intolight & @malleemiss251 Hi Girls. Pocket duty for y’all if needed.♥️
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