My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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Sondra, yeah, smoothies are great and all but are not a cure all for what ails us, if only it were that simple. I hope you get the chair and use the tube instead as well. Do they have a paratransit type service where you are picked up and dropped off at the hospital, it has been a godsend for me I have to say.
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sondraf In your pocket for tomorrow, sending strength and support. I hope the trip is easier for you as today sounded tiring. I hope you get some useful info too.
Mel Glad you got to speak with your friend and she knows how much you love her. I'm glad to hear she is surrounded by love and support . Hugs❤️
sf-cakes In your pocket with apple cider donuts …oh and Gas-X for you lol😜
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Mel, thinking of you and your sweet best friend. I, too hope you will get the chance to talk once more. It sure does put this journey of stage 4 into perspective when you know you are losing someone you love dearly. As a patient said (on The Patient Story program on TV), with stage 4 you get up knowing you have un-curable cancer. You go about your day best you can, but it's always lurking in your life. The quiet time is when I do my best to be mindful of nature and all that is well with this world.
Sondraf, hoping your scans go smooth and return a wonderful report. In pockets for all the needs of these wonderful gals. I don't know what I'd do without you all..
Two good things to report and one disaster. First, The Phillies won the National League East Division tonight. First time in 13 years. Woo Hoo.
Second, I rec'd my reports in my portal on the Brain Mri and the Pet Scan/Ct scan. Brain Mri shows occipital bone as being stable. Other UFO's (as I like to call them) are left over MS lesions. None seem very active at the moment. Next I think I love the radiologist that read the Pet Scan. She or he (named Jess) summed up the report at the top, so no surprises. Everything is either stable, resolved, lower SUV values on all that still light up and are considered moderately to minimally active. I am so blessed. Lungs are totally resolved. The culprit that started all this is an inner mammary chain lymp in left chest area. It is much smaller and has a SUV of 2.5. Originally it was 17.
Disaster is the upcoming hurricane. It just makes me sick for all that will be permanently affected by this. Please have your plans and stay off the roads if possible. Much Love and in your pockets…
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Irish~ love the word stable. I needed to hear some good news from the living room tonight. I’m having trouble sleeping. My mind is a racing car. Vrrooom. Off to this thought. Vrrrrooomm off to another. Ugh! Sleep eludes me. Love to all here. In pockets for testing, results, or just plain to talk. Good to hear Mae’s news also. What a shame it was to think one thing for that time period. THen to find out the real deal. Must have been relief.
loving those Phillies! Red October on tap. They help keep my mind off as well. Theo went to vet today and got two shots. So he’s feeling icky. Tonight. He’s restlessness is keeping me awake. He now weighs 10 lbs even. She said he’s healthy and beautiful ! I said well take it!
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Sondra - Best of luck today!
Irish - Congrats on all of your good news! Fingers crossed that you will be fine, hurricane or none.
Mel - So glad that you are able to enjoy some good things in your life right now too! I'm not particularly a sports fan, but I just love what it does for those I know who are. Nice that you can enjoy your Phillies. Oh that Theo. Glad he's OK, but sorry he's feeling down - and taking you with him, apparently. Please give him an extra pet and tell him it's from me🤚.
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Good Morning to you lovelies. It’s so encouraging to visit here. Today I’m feeling pretty good. I went to my pain management neurologist at the SURGICENTER on Friday morning and was home by afternoon. I just get the anesthesia, epidural Pain Block in my Cervical spine and then the pai is gone for the next few months. I’m glad I had it done because yesterday was my 52 year wedding anniversary with my wonderful DH. We had a very nice day together😉♥️.
I love hearing stable scans here.
@illimae I’m glad you are back home after all that traveling and testing.
@micmel Mel It’s good. You were able to talk with your dear friend. Keep Theo close to you during your conversations. I know you are suffering along with her right now. Take each day as it comes.🩵
@irishlove I always enjoy your words during check ins. Thankyou for posting.
@sf-cakes I’m in your pocket Sweet girl. I hope your day goes well.🩵
@cookie54 Life is hard for us her but Your words of encouragement says it all. Our perspectives are always changing but for the most part I feel the gratitude, and hope, and endurance here. Love you all.🥰
@mara51506 What’s cooking in the kitchen Girl. I know you ar coming up with something good 😊
@rischaller Good morning and hugs to you too 🩵
@goldensrbest Warm hugs to you today ((((🩵))))
@malleemiss251 Great o see you here my girl🥰🩵
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Shanagirl summed up all the news today so I won't repeat it all, but happy for Irish who has been struggling so much. Stable is our happy word! Thinking of all the scans and appointments today and praying for good results. Stay safe everyone!
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Shanagirl - A big congratulations to you and your hubby on 52 years! You are so very lucky!
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Sondra, hope trip today went well for you.
Irishlove, glad to hear your good news on your reports. Great job.
My thoughts to those who will be affected by the hurricane as well, hope everyone will be safe.
Mel, sorry to hear that you cannot sleep, don't worry, I will be posting my day which will have you drifting off nicely.
Shanagirl, yes, I am going to making a meal soon and pretty much have it figured out. I'll be blabbing below. Happy Anniversary!
Today is rainy here. I doing my budget boosting with the tv and my regular phone playing videos with money for. Working to get some Amazon gift cards for some cat food. I purchased chia seeds yesterday, two packages for 1.91 because I had most of the cost covered.
Garbage day today and quite a bit of recycling. Do not think it will be so bad, got this lightweight litter that forms better clumps and I do not need to throw out a bunch of litter to pick it up. That will make life easier. Organizing a bit at a time. Laundry on the go, if time allows, I will attempt the handwashing of the large blue blanket, got it planned in my head, fill up the wash side with water and put as much blanket as possible and just squeeze the blanket. Once all has gone through, leave it to drip in the tub and transfer to the bigger Panda spinner. If it works that will be the best way to do it. I also have a few pairs of socks to do. I may bust out the laundry salad spinner, yes you hear that right. I can agitate more stuff in there and then just leave it to soak for a bit, drain, add water for a rinse then softener. I end up spinning in the portable spinner of the portable washer, they come out just as clean and holds more than the wee silly washer I purchased.
Food will be the same dish twice for both meals. I have only two more of the frozen meals I had to put in the fridge. Today is last day to be in there. My thought is to chop up an cooked egg and cheese with some croutons to make a bit smaller. I will do the beans in the spice grinder, put on top with a little bit of the bacon, the precooked kind and not sure if any other seasoning needed. Perhaps later use up some beefless ground with it, I don't know yet. I am also going to be disposing of some of the tortillas as well, I never took to the tortillas so keeping the cheese packet and the taco seasoning from the soft dinner bakes to add to other future dishes. Sounds yummy to me. Can season with whatever I want or need too. Edit, made the meal above, fettucine, chopped eggs, some beans cheese and a little bacon, chopped up with croutons, added to the meal, heated that for 4 mins 30 seconds on high. Plated the food, added sour cream seasoning and salt. Did not add a binder as I wanted to keep the calories lower. It all tasted good but realize I could have added something without fat to add some moisture as it was pretty dry but great tasting. I will probably take some broth powder and add hot water and add some in that way, should work. For now, meal was nutritious. Tonight just eating the last pasta meal itself, needed to get that used up and now will move on to the freezer stuff.
For those impacted by the Hurricane, I am in your pocket to be safe and pockets for upcoming scans, life issues, SE or treatment issues as well and I hope all have a good day. There you go mel, just read down to the cooking and chores and you will fall asleep
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Garbage and recycle to go out, decided that I will take lighter bag of garbage out to the curb, probably only need one bag which would be good. Recycle, I have a bag of flyers and other paper that does not need shredding. Only shredding stuff with my personal info on and a bag of boxes. Also have food that has been unused in the crisper area of fridge, need to dispose of that too which is fine. Thinking lighter bag of garbage and recycle and take them out of the back, triple bag so I can roll them down the steps. Easiest way to get them out for me. Probably take one at a time every 20 mins or so, get really tired doing garbage so this is easier for me and with the new litter, next garbage should be far lighter.
Well, one bag of garbage and one more to go, waiting until 745 or eight to get it out. Rolling down the stairs does help out a lot, walk with cane to roll down the stairs and provide good balance, once I am done, I think that is it, does not bother me to leave recycling until next week, garbage is important as it is only every two weeks.
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Happy Anniversary Shana. So glad you had a lovely day with DH. 🌷
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Irish Congrats on stable, we sure needed good news here! I haven't followed the storm but I hope it's a big miss and all are safe.
Shanagirl Hope you get relief from PM for many months. What a life savior those injections are! Happy Anniversary also and many more to come!
Mel Hope you have a restful sleep tonight.
Hi to all, hope all appointments went smoothly today and everyone has a peaceful night.
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Cooking tonight was simple, steamed zucchini and beets with brown rice. Had some leftover baked tempeh and made a salad. Mara love reading about your process of cooking. You are so creative. I alternate between my cookbooks and my intuition, cooking is like meditation it’s my quiet time. Tomorrow I go to campus for work inperson, I work at an art and design college and need to be ther for a few meetings and a lunch - looking forward to the thai food for lunch but not the subway ride lol.. I’m so spoiled working from home.
Happy anniversary Shana 52 years is amazing , joyful love ! ❤️ hugs to you too.My cat Igor is trying to type or get me to stop typing more like it. Wishing all a restful sleep, safe from the storm , and yeah for stable scans.
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Hi all. Happy Anniversary Shanagirl and DH. So glad it was a lovely day for you two kids.
Thank you all for the best wishes on the scans. Your good vibes and thoughts must have done the trick. The highest SUV is 2.5 and that is the mammary lymp node where this stage 4 started. Sounds like the bones are rebuilding and the Ibrance even at 75 mg is doing it's job. Have MO appt. early in morning so I'm heading to bed in 5. We started to get ready for the storm as we are now under TS Warnings. DH cleaned the garage out to get the car in. I did all the laundry as I'm sure we will be without electric for a while. DH hit the grocery store. Tomorrow I'm going to video our home and contents and wrap up meds in plastic bags. If we need to leave , which we highly doubt, we will be ready. All be safe and in your pockets for all of life's needs.
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Shana - congratulations to you and DH on 52 years🎉🎉🎉. May you enjoy many more years together❤️
Irish - bravo to stable. We need good news. 🙏🏻for all those in the path of the storm.
Mel - continued prayers for you and your dear friend. What a comfort you have been for each other.
Here for pocket duty and hugs.4 -
@rlschaller That meal you made sounds delicious for sure. Yes, I will be posting meals today for sure.
I have my Herceptin infusion at 1230 pm so Paratransit coming around 12 pm. Glad that I was able to get the garbage out, only 2 bags, took one bag of recycle, can take it next week. It works well to take a 20 min break between bags to avoid being too tired. Once winter comes will make myself a path if there is snow and ice. I buy the animal and concrete friendly ice melt. Doing some budget boosting on the phone today. I want to get cat food for free if I can do it. Have some laundry, I really don't understand all the suds from my miniscule amount of the Tide Oxi, my small washer doesn't need much, spun out the soap and ran a plain water rinse before the fabric softener and vinegar rinse
Not sure on food yet, want a filling meal as I am not a huge snacker at the hospital, usually ask for gingerale in chemo suite. I am thinking of taking some of the diced onions, hashbrowns, beefless ground, chopped beans and eggs, no croutons in chopper this time. May even use the spice grinder, makes a better texture. Not sure on seasoning yet. Also wanting some of the peppers I have. Probably add some cheez whiz in a frypan to heat all this up. Have to clear sink first, left dishes soaking last night. Lazy girl way to clean dishes but only takes about 5 mins for wipe, rinse and dry so I can dirty them up again.
Hoping everyone has a good day, in pockets for those who need me as well. Just curious, has anyone heard of Sunshine (Carol) updates? I know KBL was keeping track, just wondering about that. I know wherever she is, she is comfortable.
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Mara - Best of luck with your appointment today!
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Hey ladies, Just checkining with you all to read your updates, But first I want to talk about a very sensitive subject. I Hope it will be of some help for many here on this particular forum. So here goes:
Soooo everyone my DH and I did have a great happy anniversary day. I wish I could discuss this subject with you all. Jut asking if anyone has this experience. MY Story:
Since my Stage III Cancer DX back in 2009, Our very hot sex life started to diminish due to all the treatment SE’s. I really felt so sad about it and missed what we always had our whole married life, and sex was extremely painful for me , and DH was so understanding. But I felt so guilty and bad about myself no longer having a Libido, or working vagina that had become atrophied and painful even to wipe with toilet paper after peeing. I was so sensitive and uncomfortable down there….. I knew My ONCOLOGIST HAS A NO ESTROGEN philosophy but I spoke to y gynocologist about it. She was wonderfully understanding and recommended I insert Estrodial cream 1mc into my vagina twice a week .She said I was so atrophied and irritated in their that she wanted me to take 4mc of cream the first two weeks than following prescriptions would be 1 twice a week.,,My Oncologists PA reassured me that many BC patients in his practice take this prescription and it is so small it does not get systemically in the body. It just works on the atrophied vagina by restoring the thin atrophied tissue by “plumping “it up back to the way it should be….. Well OH MY GOODNESS, I started doing this about 4 years ago, and what a difference, ladies. Libido and all the pleasure came back!!💯. I didn’t lubricate the way i used to so I apply the product ‘“ALLOW CADABRA” I buy on Amazon. It come in flavored and unflavored. DH likes th Cherry Lemon and the Vanilla Bean.😉. This has made all the difference for us with having a satisfying sex life again. And it’s made us so close during this Sage IV treatments…. Also we invested in a little pocket Rocket to use also and it guarantees orggasms for me as well…… So I just needed to share all this information with you all. Even if you are not want ink to have sex the crème will restore you down below. I love you all and since this forum is about our Husband Our life I just had to share this info with you all. Peace and Love be with you Sisters🩵😊
Hey all. Checking in to read everyone’s updates. Yesterday and last night was no so great as far as pain. A lot of bone pain in my seatbones tailbone, groin, hips spine ribs. I really think it was the weather system coming through that flared it all up. I’m always so sensitive to barometric weather changes. Today not so much.
@micmel Mel, continuing my prayers for you and your dear friend 🙏♥️
@irishlove I’m so glad you are feeling better. Please be safe, my girl, with that hurricane coming through🩵
@rlschaller Your cooking recipe sound’s yummy 😋
@mara51506 Your garbage story is so amazing….you are such a hoot! Love you girl😂
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Happy anniversary @shanagirl 💖. I am so glad you found an answer to intimacy issues. That made me smile today.
@mara51506 in your pockets for infusion today.
@irishlove so good about stable scans - also a good way to start my day's first smile.
@micmel in your pocket. This disease can hurt more when you see friends suffer from its ghastly effects.
I have scans next Tuesday. And then wait for two weeks for results. I am still getting over the disastrous probiotic experiment. We will see what scans say. I am extremely superstitious (silly, I know) so because this is the 13th month of ribiciclib and femora, I am not expecting good things - time will tell. Thank you all for the support and good feelings that you share to all.🙏
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malleemmiss - Good luck with your scans and results! I can get a bit superstitious too, so I know what you mean. I think it's silly, but I can't help myself; especially with the 13 anything.
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Right after my scans were done yesterday, I headed about 80 miles north to stay in a little (rented) cabin right near a river, and redwood trees. I needed some solace.
Just got my results, scans are STABLE. Burst into tears. For some reason, I was really really dreading these scans this time. The emotional toll this takes on all of us is exhausting.
But now I can plan a trip to see my friends in Santa Fe, hurrah!
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this year has been pretty rough on a lot of people I know and love. I just do t want to loose anyone else. I have not lost my sweet friend yet, but it doesn’t seem like it will be long. I’m so upset it makes calming my mind difficult. I hope that you’re all at least ok for tonight. Just a restful sleep. Something anything. For us alll. Keep us all stable. Bring us all peace and happiness. That’s what I want. Hugs and love to you all.
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SFcakes - Congratulations on your good results. I know sometimes you just expect something not so good, for not necessarily any particular reason. I've burst into tears when I see scan results sometimes too. Yes, hurray for Santa Fe! Go for it.
Mel - Wishing you a very peaceful night also. Thanks so much for all you do here!
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Hi sweet ladies. SFcakes, I am so very happy for you and stable scans. It's fully understandable about scanxiety, I get it everytime. This last one was the worst. mallemiss, Prayers that your scans are good, too. That's such a long time to wait for results. I saw mine in patient portal before MO even saw it. Not saying that's a good or bad thing, but for me it's probably good as I turn into a nervous nellie.
Mel, holding you close and your sweet friend, too. Shanagirl, loved your post. Hope your bones get to feeling better. This storm is wrecking havoc on every front. Mara, hope your treatment plan went well today and transport was safe and timely. Hello to threetree, too and anyone that I many have missed.
I was just sitting here thinking how grateful I am for the reduction in tumors and some resolved completely. Sure do pay for it with side effects. I'm positive diverticulitis has come to haunt me since Nov. due to Ibrance. Went down to 75mg and still had another diagnosis recently. It is painful. My ankles started to swell and tonight I can't put weight on right foot. I'm about 12 lbs over weight. Planned on losing the weight but MO said you should hold onto that weight. Don't know if this is from Ibrance or not and at this point, don't care to know. Found compression socks. Now I sound like my elderly Grandmother back in the day. She was 90 plus, I'm 68. Grateful to be alive, just wish they would come up with treatments that treat us better overall.
In pockets for all scans and life matters. Be safe. So far we've had just one band come thru that was hairy. Tomorrow??
Laurel
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sfcakes Congrats on stable!!! I just exhaled for ya as I felt the same way this time around also. I also feel like I do the same thing as far as saying ok phew now I can plan something …..terrible. Your mini getaway sounded like the perfect reset that you really needed.
Mel BIg hugs and hoping you had a decent nights sleep.
Irish You definitely have an array of health issues between you and DH. You are correct we all pay the price for stable in some way. As I have said before, my logo is " I'm willing to suffer for stable". None of these treatments are SE free…wouldn't that be a dream. Or actually it would be like the women we see in the TV ads who look perfectly healthy and are shown riding bike etc. Happy that several of us can still enjoy hobbies but many here can't. Stay safe and I hope today isn't as hairy as yesterday.
shanagirl Keep it sizzling lady! Glad you were able to restore your intimate side with DH
Mara Hope your infusion went smoothly and very uneventful.
mallemiss Thinking of your upcoming scan , your pockets will be overloaded. We all have our superstitious side for sure. I scanned many patients who always wore the same outfit or who held comforting items.I say whatever works for your mental well being you do!
We're in a stretch of the drearies here in NJ ,taking DH to physical rehab/PM doc today for consult re: steroid injections. Thank God he has minimal leg pain at the moment but typically manages to creep back in. Buster was up with the "big D" last night so my sleep was all broken up…chicken and rice for him. Hope it clears up quick!
May all here have a peaceful day..thinking of you Carol💔
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sfcakes - congrats on stable 🎉🥳🎉🥳.
shana - so happy that you found the answers to your intimacy issues. I lost my sex drive after I had my ovaries removed at 36, followed by 5 yrs of tamoxifen. Never came back but at least I can get aroused enough. I also agree that the weather does a number on us. My bones scream at me when the rains come.
mel - wish we could magically appear in the living room to hug you🤗And on that note, hugs to all here🤗🤗🤗🤗
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Good Morning to everyone today. @sf-cakes I’m very relieved for you and totally get how overwhelmed you felt before getting the stable good news. It’s always such a very sensitive time. For each one of us waiting for the next shoe to drop with this StageIV beast.
@mara51506 Prayers tht your infusion was reasonably comfortable and you can have some peaceuful calmness without too many SE’s. When you get hoe take a breath and relax
@cookie54 Hey Jersey my girl..I always appreciate you🩵
@irishlove , sweet friend, I always love your words. You are always a light here on this board. Stay safe sweet girl as that storm passes through. It’s coming up or way also. Probably why I’m so painful and stiff with my bone mets..always worse in this. Weather.
@micmel I’m thinking of you and your friend. Sending gentle ((((((((hugs )))))))) 💓warm wishes.
Sending peaceful pain free vibes to you @threetree , you are so often in my thoughts
My pockets are available for anyone who needs them
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I Just want to share something today. I am extremely saddened and feeling so low with grief this morning, My sweet little beloved Budgie, parakeet, passed away suddenly last night. I loved her so much .I’ve always had birds and everyone that ever died,I always was able to hold them in a little blanket against my heart to keep them warm while they died.
Yesterday I didn’t get to do that for her and i feel so guilty and devastated. She was no longer able to fly anymore and so she kept going to the floor to follow me around from room to room., she wouldn’t say in her cage or hang out on top of it as she always did her whole life. Her door was always open to come in and out as she wished. She was totally free. But yesterday I noticed she kept following me waddling on the floor. I kept picking her backup and let her hang with me and the pugs in the bed, but she kept walking to the. Edge of the bed and. Flying. To the. Floor. So i thought she was getting so distractin and annoying because I was trying to concentrate on reading and texting with my daughter. So I gently scooped her up and put her on her perch next to her little bird heater where she kept warm. I went back to what. I was doing and she started being obnoxious again trying to open her cage door trying to get out. She get’s persistent when she wants to be with me.. . So DH called me to come downstairs to have some rigatoni and meatballs he heated up for dinner so I went downstairs to eat with him and my son and watch the news., & watch DH feed the baby fish. After an hour or so, I cleaned and closed the kitchen and went upstairs to get comfy. I noticed she was sleeping at the bottom of her cage, which was not unusual because she has always slept laying down in a little soft washcloth at the bottom of her cage since the time she as a hatchling baby bird. She always slept like. A dog lying down on top of the cage too., never with her head tucked back on her shoulder, but laying down like a little dog. For years she always slept this way…..so I thought nothing of it and walked passed her cage and watched TV.After an hour I went up to her cage to let her back out so she could snack and sit with me and the pugs. I noticed she did not pop up to greet me but kept sleeping.I watched her and saw she was not breathing and I touched her little body and it was ice cold and she didn’t move. I knew she was gone.😔 I picked her little limp body up and held her against my heart ♥️ wrapped in a soft blanket and I wept because I felt so guilty for not being there with her in her last moments to keep her warm and comfortable in those moments. Instead she was cold and limp at the bottom of her cage not even on her warm bed I always kept there for her. I had thrown it in the wash😢. Now she’s gone and I miss her little chirps😭
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sf, congratulations on your scans. A cabin on a stream with redwoods sounds very calming and peaceful
May everyone in the storm path stay safe
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Shanagirl, yes the infusion was just fine, just have the usual exhaustion but that will pass. Thank you for checking in.
Ran the robot vac first, cats don't like it but oh well. I do find I have to place blocks in places it will get stuck but that is fine. Laundry will be on the go next, budget boosting on the go. Tidied up all my technology that I keep next to me, remotes, old phones I use to earn on or put music on and my tablets, everything in its place. Goal with my tiny place is to keep stuff off the floor. I will use the regular vacuum next for other rooms. I like the new litter, tracking is terrible but takes a couple of seconds to either run the regular vacuum, broom or robot vac which is charging. Dusting will be happening at some point today. After I get my free cat food through the budget boosting, want to save for new hand vacs, both only run a couple of minutes. Going to save for more stuff.
Edit, for the first meal, took blackbeans, used spice grinder on them and put in pan, added heaping amount of cheez whiz and a bunch of beefless ground. Added water and emptied a pack of taco seasoning, added some water to allow the taco seasoning to go through everything. Heated to high first and now got on medium with a lid on, thinking I just need the water to be evaporated then I can plate it. May add some salt and tortilla chips left over with sour cream. Any leftovers go in the fridge. Update, no leftovers but really, really full, could not even get a snack. It is super good and will make again. Next meal will be a bit lighter, take a couple of precooked eggs, cut up, add into the chopper with some shredded cheese and croutons, beef texture again. In a frypan will be 1/2 cup white rice already cooked, add the eggs but this time, use water and chicken broth to bring everything together and less binding ie no sourcream, possibly a teaspoon of mayo.
I am not doing anything as I am pretty tired but did do a good PT work out in bed. Ankle work, rotating, lifting up and down, rotations, brought legs up to head area and did the pull exercise to sit up, I had largely stopped doing that, incorporating again. Stool I bought works to give a little height to get into bed. Just have to rotate backwards, put my bum on and swing legs over, seems OK. In day, just store it vertically.
I am hoping everyone has a good day and in pockets for everyone who may need me.
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