My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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Since I have a Humpty Dumpty body pants are an evil word! Yuck !!!!!!!!!!!! I have skin in pockets and scars like a road map that are uneven. I get so mad because, people look at me and are like. , “ you look fine". Outside isn't so good. From battle wounds. Inside from toxins and cancer. Boy what a mess clothes can be to find. I can relate. Walmart may get a leggings rush. Lol
KBL~Sorry you got woken up! I have insomnia kicking in. I need to break out my kindle. That could help. Also I drink way too much water before bed. Always wakes me up. Grrrrrr my own fault.0 -
Mel, your dogs didn’t look so happy. That’s so cute.
I’ve only been on Letrozole, so I can’t comment on a switch.I get where you’re coming from with people thinking we look normal. My sister went to visit my brother the other day, the one who was just diagnosed and is within six months of dying. People would say the same thing abouthim. He looked great in the picture. It’s just so weird.
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A 90yr old woman in Coventry was injected with the Pfizer vaccine this morning about two hours ago, so I guess the world is off to the races on this. Four days before her 91st birthday and still lives at home alone. Let's hope we all have a chance at the vaccine soon!
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My 3 girls keeping me company 🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾🐾.....never alone☺️
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Mel,
Precious pictures. I still have a hard time looking at pictures of Huey. But I’ll get there. He and Tag are playing together...
Sending you big hugs!
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Thank you for the suggestion KBL. I will definitely look into those. I am sorry you were woken up. I put my phone in airplane mode and silence the ringer. I hate being awakened for amber alerts or other emerg broadcasts. Older DB and Sil have keys anyway if needed.
I took a nice half hour walk today. I am walking later after a bagel lunch with my mom's best friend who is now my friend as well but I needed some extra energy as I went to bed late. Had computer frustration until I realized, if it dies, I will get a new one. Problem solved, got to sleep.
Still loving the dogs.
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loving those goldies. I love dogs ! (Cats are cool too)!
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Thank you, Mara. I would do that, but I always want to make sure if my daughter ever needed me, she could get in touch. LOL. Once a mom, always a mom. She's the one I'm most concerned with being able to get me. I got rid of my house phone a few months ago, so my cell phone is it.
I've been having daily headaches lately. They feel like sinus, but I can't tell. My spine has been hurting more when I lay down at night. It's fine during the day when I'm walking around and sitting, but when I'm in bed, not so much. I'm still able to sleep when I don't have insomnia, but I don't know why I'm having pain when I lay. It's not to the point yet where I have to take medicine, just irritating.
Goldens, beautiful girls.
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Hello all.
Cute pics of doggies. I have my cat. I am a cat person.
Just been reading along.
Went today for monthly Lupron and Port Flush. I do these locally at my rural hospital's infusion center. That way I don't have to travel monthly to my onc's office. They do my vital signs, but do not usually weigh me. Today I asked to be weighed as I have noticed my pants waistband is a little looser. I was last weighed end of Sept at MO office visit. I know scales can vary, but, I have lost 7 pounds in 2 1/2 months. ???? !!!! Prior to this I have had a stable weight. I have noticed some new nausea periodically. And I always have heartburn/ GERD issues and on famotidine for it. Maybe nothing. But I have CT and MRI in couple weeks to look at possible new liver mets. I think I need to report the nausea, heartburn, weight loss. Not freaking out yet, but definitely has my attention.
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candy, sorry to hear about the weight loss & the nausea/issues. I hope it's sorted out. Maybe anxiety? I eat less when I'm anxious. I only notice it when I track my calories on My Fitness Pal app
I start rads on Dec 10. We have 15 sessions and with 3 stat holidays in the way, I will finish on January 4.
Today I had a phone call with my MO about what to do with immunotherapy during radiation. Chemo for sure has to halt but there's not much evidence either way about immunotherapy during rads and she asked me if I had a preference but I'm really 'decisioned out'. Her very weak preference was to be safe and halt the immunotherapy. Her logic is that both immunotherapy and rads can cause pneumonitis and if I got it, we wouldn't know which is causing it & she doesn't want anything to interfere with radiation treatment. Also immunotherapy doesn't just stop working when you stop giving it - it's supposed to have taught the immune system how to deal with the tumor so the immune system should just keep going (in fact she said nobody knows how long the immune system stays primed after immunotherapy). Anyway.I said let's halt, then. I hope we made the right decision.
This little clip made me laugh so hard. pretty much everyone in my house is this person
https://twitter.com/cfhorgan/status/13331212937057...
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Candy, I’ve mentioned before about endoscopy, but I’m not sure where. If I’ve already mentioned it to you, please ignore me. Has your appetite decreased? I wouldn’t rule out endoscopy if things don’t improve.
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moth, that video is hilarious - or, rather, it would be if it weren't so true! I have to figure out how to send it to my OCD sister. She'll love it!
Thanks for the laugh. I did put my coffee down before I watched it. Didn't want to start choking. My husband is on a conference call and I don't want to disturb him.
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KBL - I love the clip. I have a friend who is also an overthinker of the worrying type - she immediately goes to worst case scenario. I am an overthinker of the over analyzing type, so try to make a decisionwhen that's going on :-o ...and I can talk myself into why just about anything is probably okay - even when I shouldn't.
Candy - you've been sad lately, is it possible that you just haven't felt like eating? I'm not to motivated to eat when I'm feeling down
Mara - you should be able to turn off the Amber alerts. I just did that myself after an early wake up because of that. I can't turn off my phone either. Just in case one of my kids needs me, and especially when my son is overseas. I don't want to risk missing a call at odd hours.
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Moth, that’s hilarious. I can definitely be an over thinker.
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Thanks everyone for the concern.
I don't know. I will see what scheduled CT and MRI shows. And then mention the weight loss (I am sure they will weigh me at my appt, and they can see on the computer what I was in Sept and now) and nausea to my MO. Maybe nothing. But I am the type that my weight stays the same. When I was first diagnosed with cancer, I had no weight change. Yes, I have been worried/sad lately, and I do not eat well when I am worried. I am not the type that stress eats. But, I don't think my eating has really decreased much lately. You know, I am in a rut. I eat the same breakfasts, lunches, suppers. I don't do much activity except the treadmill a couple times a week. But, for instance, I had spaghetti for supper. I ate it. But then felt slightly nauseous after.
I don't know. But the weight loss is concerning for me since my weight stays stable all the time. I don't bounce around. This is the first weight loss I have had in the 3 years with MBC.
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over thinker checking in here too
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Thinking of you candy and hoping it’s just an appetite/nausea related issue that can be easily resolved.
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Candy~Thinking of you and hoping it's just nausea from all the medications we are forced to take.
I have a rant. People annoy me. People close to me. People I'm supposed to count on, people who love me. I can't be perfect not even close. My life isn't in any way perfect. It's hard. Everyday is hard. Everyday mother Effin day I feel anxiety given from another onto me. I'm sick of it. I'm sickof worrying about everyone being happy everyone not being taken for granted everyone griping about their own way they feel. All I know is I have effin cancer and I want to have peace. I don't want to be on. Edge. Stress isn't good and I've been Feeling a lot of it lately. Don't really know what to do about it honestly. Our one dog is a handful. He's a hound dog and is constantly hunting. So he makes a mess. He whines a High pitched whine a lot. Not a big fan but it doesn't bother me too much. Half the time when I say anything I should just keep my mouth shut. It's better that way. I'm just sick of hearing negativity, no one does anything right. But others do everything just right and It ispointed out also. Boy that gets old. Just people suck sometimes. Not always. Just sometimes.
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Thinking of you Candy and Mel, I get the same way about people as well.
Candy, hope there are some solutions they can give you about the nausea. I know for me, ondansetron helps a lot when I am nauseated post Herceptin for a couple of days. Allows me to eat normally. If you don't take them, a digestive enzyme may help. I do think the weight loss needs to be solved for you as I do understand the worry about that.
People do suck sometimes. I am most triggered by people being thoughtless and stupid about covid and the eventual vaccine. First are the antimaskers, lets party with a crowd anyway. Then there are the stupid anti-vaxxers starting up their drumbeat. I am going to stop watching news at this point.
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So on December 4th, I wrote about my second brother out of five having cancer. He is having hospice care and decided not to have a biopsy because it’s everywhere, so we won’t know origin.
Last night I got a call from my oldest brother. He let me know about two months ago he pulled a muscle in his chest. He was feeling it to see how it was doing and felt a lump. Last night he called me to let me know he had had a mammogram and ultrasound. They found a 6cm mass. He had a biopsy yesterday. The reason he called was to ask if I had had genetic testing. I sent him my report to show I had no genetics that came up. I have no idea what the hell is going on in our family.
He won’t know the results until next week when he sees the surgeon. I went from no history of cancer to possibly three out of five siblings with cancer in a matter of a few weeks. Although my cancer has been there since 2013.
I’m hoping the results come back negative, but it’s just mind blowing. I almost wish my other brother would have the biopsy so we can see what kind of cancer he has.
I now have one sister and one other brother who need to pay special attention.
Here is to hoping it’s a cyst. I will keep you posted.
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KBL~ I certainly hope it’s a cyst. Will be sending good thoughts !
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Geez KBL, wishing you and your family well. It’s a lot to handle and process.
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KBL- Wow. Thinking of you at this time.
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KBL - that's a lot
I hope for some good news for your family. 0 -
too much for any family to deal with. Enough already...
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guys I start radiation tomorrow & I pulled my trapezius, on the same side which the armpit is sore & has reduced range of motion from lymph node surgery. I was doing nothing - literally, lying in bed on my side and relaxing down into my pillow & my shoulder just kind of curled in under me and pulled my trap. Ugh. I'm going to go through radiation on massive muscle relaxants. It's always something ....
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KBL - so sorry to hear about another brother. I hope it turns out to be benign. And, yes, I think your other sibs should be on alert. The genetic counselor from MDAC-Jax talked about familial cancer links - I think they suspect there is a genetic link that they just haven't identified yet.
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((((((( team FU cancer, in the pub/living room here )))))))). We're thinking of you All
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Thank you Mods.
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Hello ladies
Mind lapse yesterday I had appt for faslodex shots and bloodwork but was so focused on today’s MRI I never even wrote it down. So over the past 24 hours I’ve had to sit on top of anxiety mountain. Made it to the appt yesterday 2 hours late and an Uber later.
MRI was today-thank you all for pocket duty. Like for real for real thanks to the moon DH not allowed in. Valium on board port accessed. Ugh. I cried through some of it. I was able to get Maes cabin night sky as my screen saver in my mind. So beautiful. You all pulled me through. They gave me my MRI CD 💿 so I guess I wouldn’t know what I’m looking at but I do have old ones for comparison. I’ll do that alone just in case I can actually see something.
Candy that’s a lot of weight if you’re not trying or aware. Definitely let them know. Prayerfully nothing new on your upcoming scans.
Mel I am sometimes really critical so I have to keep that inside or at least keep it leashed bc it comes out as b...hy.
KBL sorry to hear about your brother. I only recently found out BC was in my family bc we are mixed with races that were not included in our upbringing. I have in the last couple of years located and confirmed that we do have bc from that side of the family and I am the recipient.
I love the pet pics.
Thanks Mods for keeping us in your thoughts.
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