My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer
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I am here. We are having a challenge for sure. Trying to staying away and keeping myself and DH safe. It's kicking his ass a roller coaster of symptoms. It's unreal. Thanks a lot China!
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Mara, chickpeas/garbanzo beans are great for roasting. I’ve seasoned them with a little salt, pepper and garlic with a toss in olive oil. Great northern beans are also good sautéed with butter and garlic with breakfast.
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Mel, I am glad that you and your DH are staying safe, but I can only imagine how difficult it is living in the same house with a COVID patient. I hope your DS recovers soon and that you and your DH remain disease-free.
Kittykat, I am sorry that you are having breathing issues, but the hospital is the best place for you right now. Blood clots including pulmonary embolisms are not uncommon for cancer patients. My dh had two PEs when he had cancer. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Booboo, I hope that your DH realizes that he needs help and reaches out for it. As Tanya suggested, you should look for a support group, too. Alcoholism hits family members as hard as it hits the addict.
Moth, I hope your breathing issues are short-lived. Did your MO give you any idea about how long the issue can last after rads?
Mara, Thank you for the hint about beans. I never knew that. I enjoy reading about your activities. It sounds like you had an enjoyable Christmas.
Mae, Did you have a good anniversary? Did you cook something spectacular? Your new RV looks really nice, comfortable, and quite fancy.
Tanya, Is you pain level getting any better? I think of you often and always picture you with your beautiful smile shining brightly.
Rosie, I will be thinking of you and awaiting the results of your MRI. I hope they are good.
Candy, You are always so thoughtful. You add so much to the boards.
For those of you who have read or posted to this thread for a long time, I have bad news. I had sent a PM to Mary Jane because I hadn’t heard from her and she hadn’t posted lately. I never heard back from her. I did some digging and discovered that she passed away on November 20. She was such a wonderful, giving person and was active in so many things. She was just as interesting, caring,and energetic in person as she was on these boards. I can’t help thinking of her grandson. I still have the picture that I took of Lynne(Man), Mary Jane, and me as well as the one I took of the three of us with BigBHome. Mary Jane will be missed.
Hello to everyone I missed. Stay healthy and enjoy each day.
Hugs and prayers from, Lynne
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Mel, I read but do not usually post. I'm sorry your son has Covid. It sounds very challenging.Based on my understanding, one helpful thing you can do is put an exhaust fan in your son's bedroom window. This fan will draw air out of his room creating a negative pressure environment. It will stop the air, or at least some of the air, in his room from coming into the rest of the house. You can also put a towel under his door to prevent air leakage to the rest of the house. Keep the designated bathroom that he uses closed also and open the window in there too. Also, use air purifiers with HEPA filters for his room and the rooms that you are in. Make sure the filter for your heating system is upgraded as well. If you have paper plates and plastic cups for his food, let him use those and put them in a trash bag in his room. Also, when possible, open the windows in the rest of the house. Unfortunately I am not an authoritative source for these suggestions, But this is the information I have gleaned from reading about preventing transmission when a household member has Covid.
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what was her screen name. I am having a moment!
Thank you Very much for the information. It is such a challenge. I cant get it. Welcome Latte. To my second. Home. I hope you're around more.
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Lynne, oh I am sorry to hear about Mary Jane. She was posting through the summer so I did know of her a little bit. How very sad. I'm glad you have been able to bring us closure but very saddened at the loss.
re my cough - he said 10-14 days after rads would not be unusual for it to 'peak'? eeek. I hope he's wrong. In this break from rads (it's day 4 off now because this is a stat holiday in Canada) my cough has gotten a lot better which is nice, but I worry these interruptions to the rads are going to let some cancer cells survive though
I get 3 treatments this week, then another 3 day long weekend break and then the last one on Jan 4. Kittykat, glad they figure out what is wrong & are dealing with it. Smart woman for getting yourself to the hospital & not waiting longer! PEs are nothing to mess with.
mara - are you using canned beans? Do you just rinse them and then spread on cookie sheet? Do you use mostly black beans?
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I used canned beans and I spread them on a baking sheet. I turned my breville oven to 400 and found they were quite done after 10 to 15 minutes. They are rinsed before and put on the baking sheet directly. I largely plan to do this with beans in future because I like them quite a bit better.
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50'sgirl- Thank you for your kind words.
I hate, hate to hear of one of us passing on. What was Mary Jane's screen name?? And what Threads did she post on?? May she rest in peace.
Mel- Oh my. Is your DS having a hard time? My texting buddy that had Covid in October just breezed thru. Minimal symptoms. Scary how it can affect people so differently.
I got to finally see my CT and MRI results on patient portal-- they flow over after 1 week. So I reviewed them this morning. I pray I can stay relatively stable for a long time. Just 1-3mm increases in each of the liver mets. And no new ones. Good to read the report for myself even though I knew the results already. Only mention of bone mets was on the chest CT--- "scattered stable sclerotic osseous lesions in the spine". But my MO seems to concentrate on the liver more than the bone.
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he's doing ok. Just lingering symptoms like a roller coaster. I just want him back to work. I want things normal. Plus I want it out of my house!!!!! So scary. I'm not touching anything he's touched. I've given him cups plastic. Plates we can wash in the dishwasher after the fact, he's rinsed them. He's not been overly hungry. He definitely has lost taste and smell. That's a definite sign for sure. Back ache from hell. High fever. It went up to 103.8. Bobbled there for two days even with Tylenol etc... body aches to stop a train. Sooo I'm afraid of that.
Monday I felt awful. A week ago. Back ache. Head ache. Chills. Felt awful. Woke up next day and I felt fine. Then Christmas Eve ds came home looking bad. I I sent him for a test. All plans had to change , which sucked. He felt badly. Sometimes I think these young kids think more lax. My dd and Sil were tested and it came back negative. They aren't feeling to great either. No fever. Nothing but some back aches. Like I had. Same thing as me. I don't know when it will be gone from my home now. We're trying everything we can, and opening windows in 27 degree weather isn't going be too good either. ☹️ I just have to hope we don't get it. I wear a mask in the central areas of the house where he could have even been near. I wear it, until I get into my room and close the door. I'm constantly washing my hands. Or sanitizer it's a job. He can't even pet the dog.
I am disappointed I can't remember sweet maryjanes screen name. She was so active. Always doing things for her grandson and she loved being with him. I mean she even skied last year she posted pictures. She was amazing. I'm heartbroken. She was a huge part of this thread for a long time when we had our lynnes here together as Lynne did mention. She was apart of the family as well. Thank you for telling us. I always wonder where or what happens when you don't see someone for a while. I am gutted for her grand son and children/family. Mean cancer. Sick of cancer and covid. That's for sure.
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Mary Jane's screen name was MJHJAN1014. She used to post to this thread frequently. She also posted to the liver mets thread.
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I remember MJHJAN1014, did not know her well but certainly familiar with her posts. I am so sorry to everyone here who knew her well and of course her family and friends dealing with this. Really sad to hear. Hugs to everyone here who knew her and will miss her. Too many lost.
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💔😔 oh my goodness that is so sad. I am so disappointed in this news. . She was a force. Thanks Lynne.
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I remember her now. I just reviewed her last couple of posts. I always look at the profiles--- she had bone/liver too, like me. She had it 4 years. God bless her.
I also looked at my PM list--- we did not PM, but I looked at all the names of ones that I have PM'd and that have passed. OH MY. So sad. So damn sad.
Moomala posted a response after her's back in July. Have we lost Moomala too ?!
My family takes my cancer so blase. I just want to slap them into reality. Tell them this is real. This is deadly. Wake up before you lose me too.
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50’s, great to hear from you and thank you for the update. FYI, the trailer looks fancy but it was surprisingly inexpensive, it’s a 2021 model but costs way less than a typical new car.
Sad to hear about MJH, I know she was struggling this summer but her last post here at the end of august in no way indicated such a quick passing. It’s really quite disturbing.
First day back on treatment today, which is fine. The break was just under 2 weeks, so not long enough to worry me about any progression at this time. Today I also get back to my stretches for tightness (arm/shoulder) on my surgery side and walking again now that I feel fully stable and stronger. The Fitbit is charging now
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Mel, that is very true. Hopefully we are able to fill it with more good than bad things in our lives.
One thing I was thankful for, my ankle boots having vibram soles. I had not walked outside for a few days and there was no snow when I did. We had some snow and some melt and of course the side streets were not plowed or sanded. Main roads were. I was honestly scared but decided to give it a chance. While there was some sliding, it was not too bad or out of control. I walked on the side walk where I had to and moved to the road until I hit the main road which had clear sidewalks. Will have to remember this for later or else bring a small pair of cleats so I feel more comfortable.Got what I needed which is all that mattered but did not really enjoy the walk when i was nervous.
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For MJH.....0 -
Thanks to Candy, Moth, and Lynne for thoughts and pocket duty for my mri today. It turned to be a long afternoon because there was an issue with which contrast I would get. It was figured out eventually but there was a lot of extra waiting.
I was sorry to read of MJH’s (Mary Ann’s) passing. I remember reading her posts here. RIP Mary Ann.
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I gotta tell you all when it rains it pours. My dd isn't feeling well she went to get tested same place as son. Hers was negative. Sons was positive. Sil gets tested same place also negative. So that's good, but my dd called me and asked me tonight if she could come and stay with us for a little while. I think her DH. My Sil is being a bit of an asshair and needs a plucking. So I'll have both kids back home again. For a little anyway. I said the first of the year I was going to start getting my son primed to move out. If her marriage doesn't work. Maybe she can get a place with her girlfriend. The one would love to, but has a huge dog. That makes it hard because a lot of placeS no pets. I think the way he was brought up and the way I brought her up seem too different and I knew my daughter could never give up the holidays or her birthday no matter what. She loves that stuff. I feel sorry for her because she feels in the middle. His family, her way of living and life always. They just don't jive. She's seeing this as they go on. It's a shame they didn't wait to marry like I told her too. Now we lost two years on this bull crap if he doesn't wake the heck up quickly..... my son better get well soon I’ve had it
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Mel, though I am happy that your daughter was negative on covid, I am sorry to hear she is having problems in her marriage. Hopefully the time apart gives her a clear perspective on how she might want to handle things. Best of luck to her
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this has been the shittiest year that I can seriously remember m. 2016 was a bad one too but even this beats that. At least covid wasn't running rampant. It just getting worse and worse. Halloween gatherings led to more spreading, then thanksgiving gatherings lead to even. More spreading. And the traveling associated with it all. Christmas wham. It hits us bad. Now Christmas gatherings will Lead to More spreading and then New Years will be the capper! Then we sta2021 with records number of infections. Great way to start a new year. Ugh!
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That is what is happening here too. my city's infection rate has doubled since Christmas Eve. I don't agree with stores having been open until Boxing day, we should have been in lockdown as soon as the numbers went up. I am sure it will go up New Years Eve as well. Best I can do, stay home, only go pick up takeout food and groceries. Not shopping for any extras. That will help keep me safe. Walk more outdoors as well with cleats for icy parts.
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MJH, Mary Jane, May the force be with you.
Mary Jane often signed her posts that way. She was great, a special person. I feel bad that I did not know to send her a message to tell her so. That I did not know things would turn so quickly. How could she just disappear? I read her last post and it did not sound like things were dire. I suppose it can happen to any of us,any time.
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Mel, I'm sorry to hear that your dd's marriage is having trouble, you're so right, this has been an awful year for so many of us, I feel so lucky to be here where covid is a rare occurrence rather than the norm as in so many places, I'm sure its because we bunkered down and stayed home rather than having the " it won't affect me attitude" or its just like a cold, nothing to worry about, that a lot of people have, our state leaders have been very proactive in keeping us safe.
Well apparently they now think I have pneumonia and bronchitis I'm just waiting to have a ct scan to confirm it.
Take care of yourselves everyone, you're all in my thoughts, be safe on those icy streets Mara.
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Kitty Kat~Oh. No! You have to take care of yourself. That's nothing to mess around with. I am sending you some healing vibes. I'm full of them. I hope you're feeling better soon.
Shetland~ yes she did end her posts that way. It's devastating to find out we never had a chance to say goodbye. She was a force. Always on the move and she never complained. Always onto the next bake a thon or on to her next grandsons event. It seems unreal and that I'm sure she be updating us any day. It's so sad to loose someone so good. I am hurting. To. It is like they disappear. I believe moomala same thing may have happened. Just empty spaces where good women were. It's not fair. Sending hugs tonight.
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“Just empty spaces where good women were.“ Yeah. Well-put.
You and your family have been on my mind, Mel. It sounds so scary to have your son ill with covid, and to have him quarantining in the house. My kid did a two-week quarantine at home after traveling, just to be on the safe side, and it was exhausting for me to keep providing food outside the bedroom door, reminding not to go in the kitchen, figuring out how to deal with dishes and trash safely, etc. But we did not have the actual illness on top of all that. Hugs back.
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I'm stuffed with pizza and cake. Dd has been spreading her holiday baking out and made an almond cake today. She's working tues-thur and I'm going back to rads. Dh is still on holiday. We've been having a nice quiet time. Walks with Olive, board games (ds taught us a new one that he's played with his friends) & catching up on Netflix. It's been so very good to hang out together.
Mel, hope things settle at your house soon. Sounds too stressful.
Rosie, sorry you had delays today. I hope you weren't too upset by it. Did you mention when the results will be avail?
Hugs everyone
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Rosie, sorry I missed pocket duty. Will wait to hear how things go. Fingers crossed.
Mel, so sorry things are a mess at home. I know the feeling. I got back from PA yesterday, and so far, DH is doing well. I think the break did some good. He said there is no alcohol in the house, so we'll see how long that lasts. We have not had the official “talk" about next steps...that will happen today. I will be very clear that I will not continue to live the way we were before I left.
I, too, am very sad to hear about MJH. She was truly a sweet woman. May she Rest In Peace.
Love to all.
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Kittykat- Thinking of you as you fight pneumonia and bronchitis. Gentle hug.
Rosie- Pocket duty till you get results.
So many people with issues anymore. I talked to 3 friends on the phone yesterday. One has a sister with lung cancer and a brother with heart issues. Another friend's son was just diagnosed with MS. And another friend is getting a work-up for a kidney issue. And then all that are struggling here with MBC. Life is so hard sometimes.
Not much for me today. Home and maybe organizing some more files. I need to tackle a spare bedroom and whip it into shape, but I dread it with how I always feel-- fatigue and icky. The mind wants to do, but the body doesn"t.
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Morning everyone - need pocket duty tomorrow - Full CT, bone scan, and MRI of back. I really need the pocket duty more for the travel part. 6-10 inches of snow starting around noon today through the night. I’m 90 mins from cancer center and my appts start at 10:30. Wanted to get tests in at end of year as we start new insurance Jan 1 and we all know what a cluster f—k that can be🙄. So I plan on adding an extra hour of travel time. Fortunately my husband has a 1 yr old Jeep Grand Cherokee. I’m guessing the main road should be doable. And while it is just a 2 lane for most of the trip, it’s the main route from middle of state all the way west. And since I won’t be done with my day until 3:30, roads should be better going home.
I’m sorry about the loss of a family member of this room. Leaves me feeling apprehensive. It could be any one of us next time😢. Stinkin’ rotten cancer🤬.
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